Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Another Street Fighter Movie: Oh the Humanity

They are making another live action Street Fighter movie? When did this happen? Who allowed this to happen? Haven't we all suffered enough?

I mean, I must have heard about this movie at some point and my mind decided to repress that information, because oh, the horror. I don't think anyone who saw the original 1994 celluloid massacre can forget it...so much film with such potential wasted on such a horrific and futile exercise. And to think that was one of Raul Julia's last movies, which makes the whole enterprise that much worse.

Apparently this new film will focus solely on Chun Li, the plucky, revenge-minded Interpol agent who is trying to avenge the death of her father at the hands of M. Bison.

So far the producers have cast Kristen Kreuk (Eurotrip) as Chun Li, Michael Clarke Duncan (Daredevil) as Balrog, Chris Klein (Rollerball) as Nash, along with Moon Bloodgood, Rick Yune (Die Another Day) and Taboo from the Black Eyed Peas.

Now let that settle across your palette. Yes, I deliberately chose those films to show you how bad the elements could be together even before we get to what looks like chocolate icing on the cake. It is being directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak who made DOOM.

I mean, if that isn't the elements of a perfect storm of crapulence, I don't know what is. Yes, Uwe Boll and Dane Cook aren't involved as of yet, but it just doesn't look promising to me.

Personally, I think if they are going to do it, the producers should just hire the people who were making The Later Years videos and make a total farce out of the whole thing. Or better yet, they should buy the rights to 1974's The Street Fighter starring super badass Sonny Chiba and show it in wide release. I am sure New Line Cinema would be willing to part with it and everyone would win in the end.


Bart said...

Dude, they're remaking The Day The Earth Stood Still. NOTHING is sacred.

MC said...

Well, I knew that when they remade The Wicker Man.

Arjan said...

I think Kristen Kreuk would probably the only positive thing about the movie.

*stupid question..her name sounds quite Dutch..is she?*

MC said...

She's half Dutch and half Chinese.

The Foo said...

no way! tell me it's not true!

the last one was such a pain to see. even being a big streetfighter fan, i couldn't even be biased enough to sit through it and not complain. to call it a bad movie is an understatement.

I'll vote for Jet Li being Ryu but he is much smarter than to act in a potential disaster like that. that being said, Michael Clarke Duncan will be an excellent Balrog -- he's great and i'm a big fan.

i think changing the focus is a bad idea too. the reason why a lot of comic/ video game to movie adaptations don't do well is because they don't stay true to the original. they should know that by now.

MC said...

I still feel bad that the first Street Fighter Movie was one of Raul Julia's last films.