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There is this little thing going around called "10 things you wouldn't hear me say", and I usually don't do these sorts of things, but I was reminded of a great bit by Zach Galifianakis regarding things you would never hear amongst his roommates in his apartment, and in all honesty, I can't get go by a good premise without biting(though hopefully not sucking). But I couldn't do it straight up... I had to make it mine, so in the spirit of my pop cultural mission, it is all Pop Culture.
So, here are things you will NEVER hear me say:
10. I need to know what Brangelina/Paris Hilton/Michael Jackson is doing right now! I'll just turn on CNN because I am sure they have a chopper over that person's house/up their skirt.
09. I can't wait for the next remake
08. I'm so excited. Uwe Boll is making another video game movie?
07. Oh My God... that new Britney Spears/Ja Rule duet is killer!
06. I long for the days of Seagal and Van Damme again.
05. More actors should write books of poetry
04. I think they should be more pretentious and arty when they talk about their work
03. It is ok that they ripped off 70 people in their book. I mean, look at them, they're gorgeous.
02. I think their should be more shows where a group of "professionals" come in and uproot someone's life to make a pointless change for them. I mean, who can live with clutter or unfashionable clothing. Let them make those people feel like crap, because they certainly deserve it for being so unhip.
And naturally:
01. A Seminar for Scientology! Where do I sign up?
So now the question becomes, would you say any of those things?
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1 comment:
Me? Not one! You could not pay me to say such utter $#%#!
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