Monday, November 24, 2008

A Few Things that Bother Me about The Goonies Now

I was just watching The Goonies the other day, and I suddenly had a few "Wait, what?" moments. Naturally, this is pure spoiler material if you haven't seen the movie in the past 23 years, but really, if you were going to see it, you likely would have by this point so, let's get on with the nitpicking.

1. Since the Walshes hired a housekeeper, why would their mother be so upset about a few chip crumbs on a table (I know it was part of a red herring joke involving the busted privates of the miniature David statue on the same table, but in the context, it does not make sense.

2. If everyone knows that basically they are going to have to move soon, why hadn't anyone started packing before that day? I know denial is a huge thing and all, but still, I think it is rather strange that no work had been done in the houses we see in the movie.

2a. The Rube Goldberg device that opens the gate... if the packing wasn't done, you'd think that they would have at least had the decency to tell one of their kids to break that down. It is totally unnecessary and would likely make moving boxes and furniture out of the house a lot more difficult.

3. At the end of the movie, I am now trying to figure out exactly how that little bag of jewels saves the entire Goon Docks. Forgive my ignorance about how eminent domain works in the United States, but I have no idea how the addition of jewels into the financial coffers of the Walshes could derail the entire project (as I don't believe that the jewels in hand would be able to save each of the homes of the Goonies involved, let alone 50 or so houses as mentioned by Troy). Can anyone explain this to me?

4. I know they cut the octopus scene out, you know they cut the octopus scene out... why didn't they just cut the mention of said animal out of the dialogue at the end of the movie. Really... it isn't that hard to do.

These are just the things that occur to me off the top of my head... I am sure there are many more flaws that I didn't see as a kid that are glaringly obvious now as an adult. GAH... sometimes I hate my brain.


Semaj said...

Good points, I still watch this movie about every year.

Yeah, I few of my friends mentioned seeing the octopus scene in the theatrical version, but it was later cut out in the Cable version.

You’re right; if they cut the scene out of the cable/DVD versions, why keep the mention of it in the last scene?

Why leave the scene in some versions, but remove it others.

Movies during the 80s tended to leave that sort of thing in for some reason.

Side note: If I remember correctly, there was another scene that was cut out involving escaped Gorillas. I remember the cast talking about it on the commentary.

Megan said...

All good points, but I prefer to just pretend I'm ten when I watch it. ;)

Brandon said...

Like they said, good points. But it's the frigging Goonies. It was filmed in Astoria (near where I'm from), I give it so many breaks just for that.

MC said...

Semaj: Gorillas would have been too much I think.

Megan: I saw the wizard's feet underneath the curtain... I couldn't help myself when it came to pulling it back.

MC said...

Brandon: I give a lot of movies filmed in the Detroit area that same courtesy I guess.