Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Missing my Peers

You ever have one of those weeks where you look back nostalgically at your recent past. Well, I was doing that earlier this week.

In particular, I just started thinking about all of my fellow blogging peers that have fallen by the wayside over the years, and in retrospect, it was a fairly long list of people. And it made me sort of depressed to think about all those voices which are now silenced or for all I know, they are merely blogging under a different moniker about a totally different topic these days. After all, I am certainly familiar with doing that myself.

But sometimes you never realize how many people you miss talking to on a semi-regular basis until it is too late. I've lost touch with some many great people over the years, and I sort of wish I knew what they were up to now. Granted, in most cases, I only knew the little bit of themselves that they let show online, but still, they were almost always captivating personalities. I am not going to name names or blogs however... because then I would be listing all day.

And I think that is why I got so upset about all those old comments from my first six months at Culture Kills disappearing... because a lot of the people who left them no longer blog, so when I would repost some of my old entries, I could read their comments and think back to how things used to be here. It was usually an entertaining trip down memory lane. But I have to accept that those comments are likely gone forever.

On some level, it has made me question my own blogging longevity. I mean, how have I managed to blog for so long while other more talented and prolific people didn't make it? Because deep down, I think most of what I write these days is sort of terrible (and that isn't a ploy to get some sympathy comments). Somewhere along the line, I feel like I lost some of my original spark.

I wonder if I will ever feel the same exhilaration I did when I started this blog at some point.


Semaj said...

I’ve been thinking about this subject too. I’ve seen so many good blogger just disappear over the five years I’ve been doing this. What goes through their minds when they delete their blogs? Do they ever consider going back to it?

I’ve thought the same thing? Why I’m still around when my of my peers are gone.

You’re right there is a spark when I first started writing on the blog that I certainly lack now. I think I’m a sharper and better writer now, but there is this gleefulness to writing the blog back then.

I also been thinking about “blogging first times”.

-When you got that first comment on a post
-When your first spammer attacked your blog (on second thought…)
-When you got your first steady readers
-When someone put you on his or her blog roll.
-When someone linked to your blog for a story or entry

Powdered Toast Man said...

I don't get why bloggers just fall off the face of the blogosphere either. I'm sad when I click on a blog in my dashboard and it tells me it no longer exists.

There is no way of contacting that person either unless you have emailed them a lot.

I wonder too how long I am going to blog for, I can't do it forever.

Thanks for commenting on Just the Cheese.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Ah great. That is all I need to think about - all those who I have lost from my blogroll. It was so depressing when I dropped those who no longer blog from my list. I also started a tumblr which meant I dropped off some of the tumblr sites I follow over there. It's a rare thing when you have been at it this long and it's surprising how close you get to certain other blogs. I remember my first comment and that guy is no longer around. I hope they are happy and I suspect they are. Happiness and blogging seem to be inversly related.

MC said...

Semaj: Considering a lot of your peers are my peers (since we cover the same beat), I have a feeling we are missing a lot of the same people too.

I think part of the reason I've felt I've lost my spark is because I've been doing this so long now that on some level, I believe I have exhausted all my good ideas and my more recent efforts are inferior by nature.

Speaking of blogging firsts, remember your first hate comment/troll especially of the anonymous variety? Good times.

Powdered Toast Man: I've noticed that people who come out and say they are closing up shop on their blog are more likely to start a new blog than those who just let their blog trail off... those are the saddest ones of all, because there is no closure.

I know that eventually I am going to stop blogging. I don't know when, but there will be a day when I no longer put words down on a screen like this. I accept that inevitability.

Cal: I think unhappiness drives blogging (and let's face it writing in general) for the vast numbers of people who do this.

DEZMOND said...

well, everything changes, everybody moves on, everything gets boring ... that's how the world goes.
Some people get busy careers, rich love lives, lots of kids and just never have any more time for blogging.

Drew said...

I'd been thinking similar things just the other day. I know a lot of clever, witty people who used to blog but who abandoned their little plots of online real estate --- and in many cases, abandoned mine as well. And to do what? Post status updates on Facebook? To tweet? I do both those things, but I feel like they could never replace my love for blogging and the satisfaction I get from having a place to post whatever I want in whatever length I want in a way that will be theoretically accessible to internet users forever. I won't stop, at least.

MC said...

DEZMOND: I will likely never have many of those things. Now that's a sad thought.

Drew: And you've been rocking it with interesting and insightful posts for quite a while too, and I totally respect that.

John said...

I started blogging back in February of '05. I was a Christian and a Christian blogger, and in fairly short order I had the largest Methodist blog in the world. That didn't last too long, but I was always within the top 5. I kinda liked that. And I made a lot of friends, but all within that circle.

When I had finally realized that I needed to get the hell out of that cult, I left a lot of good friends behind. Oh, a number of Methobloggers kept on hanging out. And almost all of them were decent about my departure, if not openly sympathetic to how the Church had done to me. But we drifted apart. I only keep in touch with a couple now.

I miss the old gang. But if losing community with them was the price that I had to pay to get my life back, then it was worth it.

MC said...

I had one of the most popular blogs at a huge blogging site (at one point, I was the second most popular blog there). However, it was a very conservative place, and some place where most of the time I felt very angry and alone, and that wasn't good for me. Not everyone there was like that of course, but being in that environment wasn't good for me. So I left, and I didn't tell anyone there that I was going. I met a few other people who left too, which made me feel good.

I am not saying that I totally understand where you are coming from at all John, because I've never been in a situation like you describe. I am glad you got out though.