Monday, May 19, 2008

MGM is Remaking two movies starting with R

MGM confirmed over the weekend that they are indeed making a remake of Robocop, and when you think about how recent remakes of formerly subversive and satirical films have turned out, well, you can see why almost an entire generation of geek boys and girls are silently dying inside. For shame, MGM, for shame.

And along with destroying a classic, MGM also said they are committed to redoing Red Dawn for modern times, which is a wonderful idea. I mean, how could remaking a somewhat crappy movie (sorry, Mr. Sobchak... err Milius, but it is the truth) from the 1980's about a simultaneous invasion of the United States by Soviet and communist forces from Latin America during the Reagan phase of the Cold War and modernizing it be a bad idea. I guess the Red will come in from either the increased bloodshed a la Rambo or, I don't know, the potential losses from its filming, instead of that whole Communist angle. The fact that both now and then a superpower is fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq is in the middle of a war with *ahem* purported Iranian ties should be taken as being completely coincidental. The lack of originality in Hollywood exceeds any capacity their executives have to come up with such a complex and subtle international relations connection. Scratch that. Subtlety and Hollywood don't go together period.

That being said, if this movie is, as theorized by some of my peers in the blogging village, about terrorists invading America, well, I saw that movie in the 1980's as well. It was called Invasion USA. I guess the producers are afraid of those Chuck Norris stories coming true on them.

Honestly, I cannot see a way a Red Dawn remake could ever be good. Even if the producers somehow manage to computer-generate faux Patrick Swayze snot bubbles on another young cast member(somehow I have the felling that Zac Efron is going to be cast).

So the onus is on the producers and cast to prove me wrong.


Arjan said...

not looking forward to Robocop..but will probably watch it ..but not in in the cinema.

Red dawn...haven't seen it, but remaking it..sounds like a bit lame.

Megan said...

Why you gotta crush (my admittedly small) Monday night groove?

Mr. Fabulous said...

Oh my, I must disagree. Red Dawn is the classic. I must protest any remake. Look how many future stars were in it. I quote lines from it all the time.


Karl said...

I actually liked Red Dawn. Course, I haven't watched it since I was a teenager. What? I liked "Once Bitten," too.

Anonymous said...

nO remakes! YIKES!I couldn't watch them the first time

MC said...

Arjan: Yeah, I remember your opinion about the whole thing back at Quit your Day Job about Robocop.

Megan: I just report the bad news, I don't usually make it.

Mr. Fab/Karl: I am not ripping on Red Dawn... I am just saying it could have been better (think about those Remembering columns I write and think about the caliber of movie I usually choose to cover.

La Crabcuracha: My sentiments exactly.... about the remakes part.