Javier Bardem: Bond Villain?

Even if it is just a rumor at this point, I really like the idea of Javier Bardem playing the villain in the upcoming James Bond film.

Given some of his other roles, he could definitely bring a lot of nuance and charm to such a role, and I think Daniel Craig would have a lot to work with when the two actors were both on screen at the same time.

I mean, we could end up with a film directed by Sam Mendes starring Daniel Craig, Rachel Weisz, Javier Bardem and Dame Judy Dench? I don't know about you, but that is a pretty strong lineup.

I think even if I didn't like the Bond movies, I would be interested in the possibilities of such casting.

P.S. While we are discussing James Bond, I would be remiss if I didn't mention the passing of composer John Barry, who worked on over ten Bond songs/soundtracks.

Sunday Video: Emily Jane White Sings Liza

I stumbled upon One Track Mind's 10 Best Tracks of 2010, and at number 3 was this gem by Emily Jane White.

Hauntingly beautiful.

Week 37: Pageant of the Transmundane

OK, this one isn't funny, it is just weird. A couple from Ohio who moved is being prevented from selling their house because they owe 6 cents to the local water company. 6 cents.

This week's winning entry comes to us from All That Is Interesting

In this case, it is the actual advertisement for the casting call for audience in the Smells Like Teen Spirit video.

Since this week's winning entry has to do with Nirvana, I thought Homer's stint in a grunge band would be the most appropriate way to express that.

Congrats! Here is your badge.

The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Charlie Sheen In Rehab

I am not here to make fun of Charlie Sheen or Two and a Half Men.

I am glad that he is finally getting the help that he needs. He was clearly someone who has long been in the midst of a series of public incidents which may have been, on some level, cries for help.

But of course, it is public knowledge that for many years, Charlie Sheen has been battling his demons and doing bad things, things which I can't and won't defend.

I don't know if he is ready to get clean yet... the only person who knows the answer to that question is Charlie Sheen.

Wow. America Really Is Screwed Up

So a loving family that happens to be gay is considered obscene in parts of the United States. A woman snapped this picture at a local supermarket chain in Arkansas.

That is seriously messed up. It would make you think that they were engaging in sexual acts or having a blood sacrifice behind that screen rather than proudly holding a lovely baby.

I wonder if those same kinds of shields would have been put in place during a different time if their was a picture of an interracial couple on a magazine cover.

Because of the furor this has caused, the shield has come down, but it still messes with my mind that showing two men holding a baby is obscene.

I really have to do another Enemies List post soon.

Midweek Video: Intermezzino Pop

You know, I could have sworn I posted this Ennio Morricone gem from 1970 before, but when I search for it on my blog, I guess I haven't.

Excellent loungey stuff.

Now That's An Epic Conan Burn

Conan O'Brien went to Harvard.

Harvard has a prestigious award which it hands out to accomplished actors and actresses given out by the Hasty Pudding society.

They have decided for the second time in their history to give the award to a talk show host.

The host they've chosen to give the award to this year is Jay Leno.

The burn was so hot, I've gotten sunburn just hearing about it.

Kevin Smith Says Working With Bruce Willis Was Difficult

Last week, Kevin Smith came out and discussed working with Bruce Willis and described it as a very soul crushing experience on the Marc Maron podcast.

But you know, I could have told you Bruce Willis was likely difficult to work with based on earlier stories told by a certain director.

That director's name was Kevin Smith.

Because I remember a tale he told during his third An Evening with Kevin Smith DVD about working with Bruce Willis, and how it took 5 days for his small cameo featuring just 3 guys in a room to be filmed for Live Free and Die Hard. I remember his description of Len Wiseman before making the movie, full of excitement and joy at being at the helm of a Die Hard movie... and then that same man on set as a seemingly broken man.

Now if I can remember that, how come Kevin Smith couldn't?

I know that working with Bruce Willis probably seemed like an awesome idea, even after seeing how he worked on Live Free or Die Hard, he should have known that he was going to be difficult. All those qualities which he spun in his monologue a few years ago were going to be the same ones which bit him in the ass.

I don't think he is passing the buck about Cop Out by discussing Bruce Willis, but I think he just should have known better about him. I mean, the way he talked about how Willis treated him on Die Hard should have raised red flags.

And after Linda Fiorentio, he knows the horrors of working with someone who he doesn't get along with.

Sunday Video: We Are the Champions

Over the course of the past week, I've won the US Open Cup, The MLS Cup, The North American Superliga and the Pan-Pacific Championship as The Columbus Crew in Football Manager 2011.

Oh, I did all those things in a single 12-month period too (March 2011-February 2012). I think I've earned this song.

Week 36: Pageant of the Transmundane

Duke Nukem Forever, the dictionary picture for vaporware, has received a release date. Can it live up to almost 15 years of expectation? And more importantly, is it actually going to be released? Only time will tell.

This week's winning entry comes to us from a blog called Street Boners and TV Carnage.

Actress Brooke Smith of Silence of the Lambs and Series 7: The Contenders fame also documented the hardcore scene in New York and she submitted her photos to the site. Makes me jealous sometimes to see how adventurous some people have been in their life.

And since this week's winning entry is related to Silence of the Lambs, I thought this image would be the most appropriate display of that.

Congrats. Here is your badge.

The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Celebrity Autobiography

Oh, I have to see this stage show. Or Comedy Central has to pick it up as a series.

Someone came up with the brilliant idea of having comedians read from the self-indulgent autobiographies of celebrities. I mean, that is a stunningly simple yet hilarious idea.

Because there are a lot of people who are so full of themselves that things that were transcribed to the page just have to be read and gently mocked.

Just the idea of it makes me feel good all over.

Celebrity Autobiography sounds almost too good to be true.

Midweek Video: Stephen Colbert Tears Sarah Palin Apart

I love this so much, and the fact that every statement is prefaced by "I know you..."

But then again, would I expect anything less from him after the White House Correspondence Dinner.

Dire Straits Song Deemed Unfit: One Man's Opinion

Well, over the weekend news that the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council has banned the Dire Straits song Money for Nothing because it uses the word faggot three times and therefore it is not deemed to be unsuitable for air in 2011.

Now, there are a lot of jokes to be made about the quality of the actual song, but based on the content, I think this action is a mistake.

I can understand why the gay and lesbian community would find the use of that word off putting, but in the context, it doesn't seem as bad as it is being made out to be.

I think the thing that everyone who is arguing in favor of this ban is missing is the context. Mark Knopfler is singing as a bigoted character, and that is an important distinction. He is playing an Archie Bunker-type of character in 1985, so in that context such a person referring to someone like this:

in sexually dismissive and offensive terms makes that character look bad, even at that time. You aren't supposed to be sympathetic to the narrator of that song. You are supposed to think he is an asshole... that was the whole point.

Look, I am not condoning the use of that particular word, but when used in context, it can have a societally positive effect, and I wouldn't want such works to also be censored. Like something like Language of Violence by the Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy or similar work which uses that language but in such a way to question its use rather than glorify it. Because I am sure there are other songs on the radio that have blanked out the actual word that really are hateful to the gay and lesbian community as a whole, and yet that is ok, isn't it because a word isn't there.

This is sort of similar to that whole Huck Finn brouhaha... though Money For Nothing isn't even in the same sport as the work of Mark Twain.

But I think the reason this action bothers me so much is I've gotten used to a certain level of intellectual freedom on our airwaves... that we didn't remove content because it made someone uncomfortable, and now some of that sense is gone now.

Rest In Peace, Trish Keenan

Broadcast frontwoman Trish Keenan passed away on Friday due to pneumonia-related complications. She was 42.

I had been a fan of Broadcast from the first time I saw the video for Papercuts, and it was mainly due to the haunting quality that Trish Keenan's voice had.

I own all the group's albums, but I never got to see them perform live, and from what I've heard, I really did miss something special, because it was in that sort of environment that Trish Keenan shone the brightest.

I am listening to the Work and Non-Work album as I write this, and it is as beautiful now as it was when I first heard it. That collection, along with The Noise Made By People got me through a lot of things in my life and to know that the force behind them is no longer with us affects me more than I thought possible.

The news that she had died hasn't fully sunk in yet. I was writing another post when I just happened to click on a link to an article on The Guardian about her passing, and that is how I found out. It took me a second when I read the summarizing paragraph to realize she had died because my brain caught up to the fact that the words being used were in the past tense.

I have the some of the same sadness in my heart that I did when I learned of Mary Hansen's accident in December 2002. I also feel guilty for some strange reason, and I don't know why.

Her friends and family have my deepest sympathies and condolences.

Sunday Video: Aubrey Plaza as Sarah Silverman

A few weeks ago, Semaj posted a video of an LSU student having a meltdown at a Papa John's, and it reminded me of Aubrey Plaza's turn as Julie Powers in Scott Pilgrim. Especially the Second Cup scene.

And while I was looking for that, I discovered this gem.

I love the fact that it basically deconstructs the elements of Sarah Silverman's comedy into its basest elements, and she got the voice and mannerisms down pretty well too.

Week 35: Pageant of the Transmundane

Well, by now we've all likely read about the change to the zodiac as announced by a single person. Personally I think it is just a scam to get people to buy more of those Horoscope scrolls because people will now buy their new sign and their old one in that format.

Anyway, this week's winning entry comes to us from the warm, inviting shores of nostomanic.

In this case, it is an examination of just how warped Kids Incorporated was, and it includes some Amber dancing. And as you know, Amber dances and I respond with award-season fervor. (I secretly want to be just like Amber when I finally grow up).

And since this week's winning entry discusses the late 1980's, well, it seems that the vision of The Simpsons from that same era seems like the most appropriate thing I can post.

Congrats Amber. Here is your badge.

The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Football Manager 2011: My Cruel and Tempting Mistress

Back in 2001, I happened to pick up a remaindered British gaming magazine called Strategy Player because it had a disc with game demos on it. In that magazine, there was a review of a game called Championship Manager 00/01, which to me at the time looked absolutely enthralling. Unfortunately, that was the age when if you didn't live in the region where a game might be popular, you'd never be able to buy it, and as a North American, soccer management games were never going to be popular, so I'd never seen that series over here.

And every time I would look through that magazine, I'd wonder about that game series, but I'd soon forget about it.

Skip ahead to last month and my discovery over the course of a single Sunday afternoon that a) my integrated graphics card could play higher end games than I first suspected, b)I unintentionally became aware that there was a PC soccer game called Football Manager 2011 released about a month before that day with some really compelling reviews and c) the place I went to buy it was having a sale that day making it almost 50% off. So I bought it.

I was to later discover that the Football Manager series is the spiritual descendant of Championship Manager... Eidos kept the original name, and the developer, Sports Interactive, moved on and started doing their own games, with Sega distributing their work. So in essence, I was buying into the series that I had wanted to get into for almost a decade.

As a North American, I was also rather surprised to read that the week the game came out, it was the top selling game in Britain. And when I look at some of the other games it beat, well, that is truly impressive. I was to later learn that FM 2011 outsold World of Warcraft: Cataclysm, The Sims III and Starcraft II in Britain in 2010. That is a lot of sales. And yet, it doesn't really get anywhere near that amount of attention on this side of the Atlantic, despite the various legal ways of acquiring it like Steam and other direct download services. The fact that the official site doesn't even list North American in its buying options is an indication that really, I wasn't the target audience for this game.

To best express the general feeling that one of these games gives you, this trailer for the 2008 iteration of the series really nails it while also giving Rudyard Kipling his due.

I love the fact that every trailer I've seen for one of these games touts the experience without showing in-game footage, because frankly, seeing the game in action in a trailer wouldn't do it justice. It isn't really pretty to look at compared with the FIFA or even FIFA Manager series, but it just feels right. There is just so much depth in this game that I really don't need it rendered in 3D and pixel-shaded out the wazoo.

Of course, it can be run in 3D if you want it to, but I prefer watching the little circles move around. I guess that makes me weird these days. I should also mention that aside from the actual games themselves, there is no sound or music. I have to admit that took some getting used to.

But as someone who has had a long abiding interest in soccer games, one thing that has always managed to garner my interest in a particular title is how many leagues and teams it has. Football Manager 2011 has leagues from 51 countries, encompassing 117 different leagues. To put that in perspective, FIFA 11 only has 25 countries and 31 leagues. That is a lot of teams, and a lot of players.

But the thing that is amazing is it is so easy for the modding community to add new content to this game as well. For instance, the game starts off with you being able to choose the English leagues down to the sixth level. Well, someone then created a mod that opened up the league system down to the 8th level. Then someone created a database so you could play as teams 11 levels down in the English Football League System. That's a lot of teams and a rather wide pyramid. I mean, that ends up being almost 1500 teams. It is mind-boggling that a group of people are that dedicated to the sport that they put something like this together... and there is work being done to take it down to level 12. And people are making these kinds of efforts for a lot of regions in the game which either don't have their leagues in the game as of yet in a structured way (like Africa for instance) or extending the league structure in countries like Iceland down farther than I ever thought possible.

But having a lot of teams can't save a mediocre title, and I am glad to say that FM 2011 really does give you an emotionally-fulfilling and deep experience as well.

Let me tell you a tale. I started my first game unemployed and just applied for coaching jobs as they opened up. I eventually got a job with a second division club in Turkey called Diyarbakirspor, and at the beginning, I had some successes, even though I didn't exactly know what I was doing. But then, the team started losing, and I just couldn't get out of the skid. I was getting really emotionally involved in what was happening. And as the losses mounted, (oh, and what a winless streak it was), I could tell I was losing the team too and they had stopped playing for me. Then they started telling me to my face that they didn't trust me. There was a point where I could tell I was going to get fired but I didn't know exactly when.

Then the hammer finally fell after a tough loss, and the moment I read the press release, I almost felt relieved.

The longer I play the game, the more nuances I see. I experienced the heartbreak of losing a good player because I got caught between an arbitrarily set fee from my board and the machinations of an agent who was looking for just a little more from our organization than I could provide... and then that same agent then tried to screw me really bad on another one of their clients just because he didn't like the fact that he thought I wasted his time on the previous deal. Or watching a promising season and cup run collapse because a few of my players got a little overzealous during a game against a rival and got themselves suspended or injured. Or seeing a player thrive after moving them a little bit out of their normal position and discovering how a team can come together if you put it together in the right formation on the field.

Football Manager is one of those games that to understand just how addictive it is, you actually have to play it. Because once you are in, it is like crack and one of those experiences that has you constantly saying to yourself, just one more game or one more season or even one more transfer, and knowing that if you get things just right, you too can be a champion, even with the lowliest of teams. In fact, Football Manager is part of the reason I haven't been blogging as much lately. And for a single game to do that to me, that speaks volumes about its addictiveness. But it was some of the best money I've ever spent given the hours I've put into it and will likely put into it in the future.

A Porno Too Far

OK, I admit it was funny reading about all the television-based parody porn that has been coming out the last few years. I mean, yes, porn parodies aren't a new thing, but there seemed to be a renaissance of them lately with what seem to be high production values. I even went on the record saying that I would have been interested in watching the 30 Rock one just for the jokes.

I learned about quite a few of them from Semaj's blog, as he had a tendency to subtly mock them, (which was awesome by the way), and most of them seemed to be harmless and in good humor.

But I've just read about an upcoming parody that is really crossing the rubicon into the world of ick.

You see, someone thought it would be a good idea to make a live action porn parody of The Simpsons... with yellow makeup. Full body yellow makeup.

I don't care if they cast the most desireable people on the planet to be in this thing, just the idea of sex acts occuring where something covered in makeup is entering an orifice, any orifice, is just sort of gross really.

I would have just loved to have been in the meeting when this idea came up and hearing the logistics of how they intended to do it, because I don't think most makeup is meant for oral consumption, and cleanup would have to have been a pain in the ass.

There is a SFW trailer for this movie. I am not going to post it because I think just the thought of green-yellow people having sex to simulate a cartoon should be enough to gross you out. I don't need to make you throw up. (I almost said ralph, but I didn't want to even be associated with an unintentional Simpsons pun like that).

For shame pornographers, for shame.

Michael Douglas on the Paparazzi

I love the fact that Michael Douglas is demanding that the members of the paparazzi that got paid to take pictures of him during his battle against cancer pony up some of those funds to cancer research.

It won't likely happen because most of them don't have the shame most people are born with naturally, but I like the fact that he is putting the honus on them for a change.

Because I've tuned into TMZ a few times, and after even a few minutes, I totally understand why celebrities beat the hell out of these people sometimes. They don't seem to have any boundaries.

The Total Recall Remake Getting Set To Start Filming

Hmmm...

So we are going from Arnie:

To Colin Farrell:

I don't know if that is better or worse really. I like the original story, so I am really a lot less negative about the prospects of this particular remake, despite the original being made just 20 years ago.

But the thing that I am happy about is the fact that it seems like everyone seems to be against going 3D with the movie. That is always good news.

You know, I can't believe I am saying this, but I might actually be looking forward to this remake.

I'm as shocked as you are.

Week 34: Pageant of the Transmundane

Well, I am using the same graphic two weeks in a row. But it is so worth it.

This week's winning entry comes to us from Itsbomb.com.

In this case, it is a mashup/performance of Queen's Don't Stop Me Now being partially recreated in 4 simultaneous screens of custom Super Mario Bros. 3 levels. It is a lot better than I am making it out to be.

Watch it.

And as I mentioned, since this is a Super Mario related item, Mario vs. Homer seems to once again be the most appropriate image.

Congrats. Here is your badge.

The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Adam Curtis on Oh Dearism

From Charlie Brooker's Newswipe, a short documentary on how modern news narratives have changed since the 1960's.

Even though I live in a different news region, I have noticed this change since the 1980's.

A Headline That Answers Itself

Love is an emotional response to something, is it not? So how could you love a movie without being emotionally involved in it?

I read the article that followed that headline, even though it does seem like a pretty self-evident concept, does it not? It elaborated on that theme, but I don't think it needed more than just the title alone.

Buster Coen: Great Early Career Movie Credit

On True Grit, 15-year old Buster Coen, son of Ethan Coen worked as an assistant to the script editor. But he didn't want that particular credit.

Instead, he is credited at Matt Damon's Ab Double.

If I was 15... that would be a cool credit to have. Hell, I'd put that on a business card and hand it out until I went to college.

Publishing Company Wants To Release Huck Finn Without Racial Epithet

A publisher is planning on releasing a version of Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn without the word "nigger". While I am really not a fan of that word, its use in that particular work is important and used as part of a larger historical context, and as such I disagree with this change on a very deep level.

However, since the work is in public domain, there is nothing I can really do about it. I mean, if the Kindle versions of public domain books can have words changed to mark them as those versions then I suppose in theory they can do this.

But this kind of political correctness bothers me on a lot of levels, not the least of which is it messes with history and plays into efforts to revise the past into something it wasn't. The past was in many ways a brutish, nasty time where people did bad things to each other. I am not idealizing the present by the way. We as a collective still do some brutal things to each other on an institutional level. But somehow trying to put a little bit of a glossy veneer on social norms of the past isn't helping anyone.

Because in trying to distance Huck Finn from that word and that world, the editor who is making that decision is also in many ways trying to eliminate the conversation that goes along with that word. And it is a conversation which Mark Twain wanted people to have.

And while I don't know the entire thought processes of Mark Twain, I think it is safe to assume that he certainly wouldn't want the above changes to be applied to his work.

24: The Feature Film Delayed (at least)

I just read a report that said that everything seemed to be in place for a 24 feature film, but Fox rejected the script.

I have a feeling that if this movie doesn't get made soon, it won't get made at all, because this is the kind of situation where you have to strike while the iron is hot... because people forget about a series after a while, so the return of Jack Bauer in a feature film might not have the same impact in 2-5 years that it would have during the upcoming summer for instance.

Yes, there is talk of Tony Scott being involved and such, but while everyone is trying to put a positive spin on this, I think the script being rejected is likely going to be the first step in the process of the project finally getting killed by studio executives... at least for theatrical release.

But I know there are a lot of people who want more Bauer action, but honestly, I am fine with the way the show ended. Of all the finales I saw over the past few years, it was one of the more satisfying conclusions, and I am prepared to live with that ending.

Week 33: Pageant of the Transmundane

Well, delaying this award a week for the Christmas holidays seemed to be rather beneficial for me, as I got to see a lot of weird stuff.

So when I stumbled upon a video that has been making the rounds the past couple of weeks. I just happened to find it at GameRanx, so they get the award this time out.

In this case, it is a wonderful reimagining of the Mario Brothers as characters in the Grand Theft Auto universe/style. Awesome stuff.

And since this week's winning entry has to do with Mario, I thought this old favorite would be the most appropriate image.

Congrats to the crew at GameRanx. Here is your badge.

The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

For Your New Year's Hangover

Drink a lot of fluids and get some rest, y'all.