Week 12: Pageant of the Transmundane

Researchers in Texas have discovered that certain people love Apple and their products so much that they display the same behaviors as religious followers. Like that is news to anyone.

But it seems we have a new milestone, as far as I remember. Yes, we have a winner who has won this award two weeks in a row. As you know, it takes a lot to up the ante and win this prize more than once in a short succession, let alone win it twice in a row. But that is what has happened. Calvin's Canadian Cave of Coolness has done just that.

Last Saturday, Kal posted a video which has been making the rounds this week: Ron Livingston covering Keyboard Cat. It is just surreal, and it was nigh unbeatable this week.

And because this entry has to do with cats, well, Homer and Snowball seemed the be the best representation of the winner.



Congrats Kal on doing the near impossible.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: calvin's canadian cave of coolness, homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, keyboard cat, ron livingston, anger management, church of apple, cult, repeat, unprecedented, snowball

One Remake Out, Another One In

Well, this week we had the announcement that one Paul Verhoeven film was temporarily safe from being remade... and news that another film on his C.V. is being remade.

Yes, the long anticipated, Kurt Wimmer-penned remake of Total Recall may be starting production, as Len Wiseman is in discussions to direct that film.

Now, if they are making a movie based on "We Can Remember It For You Wholesale" and just titling it Total Recall, than I am completely cool with that, because it is an awesome short story. It isn't an action spectacular, but rather a more cerebral experience, and that is what I would hope the remake would be. (I also think of John Carpenter's The Thing as a more faithful reimagining Campbell's "Who Goes There?")

I remember reading stories about how initially, the original Total Recall was going to be directed by David Cronenberg, and he was going to go in a completely different direction with it, but then Carolco bought the rights to the picture and Schwartzenegger came in, and that was the reason he quit.

But thinking about the movies both Wimmer and Wiseman have made, it doesn't seem likely that the new Total Recall is going to be a brilliant thought experiment. I could be wrong. I mean, if it was Christopher Nolan making it, I think it would be awesome because this seems like something that was totally up his alley.

I guess I can only hope for the best.

Tags: total recall, len wiseman, kurt wimmer, john campbell, john carpenter, robocop, philip k dick, we can remember it for you wholesale, david cronenberg, cerebral, the thing, arnold schwartzenegger

Midweek Video: Come Into My World

I am posting this video for the Michel Gondry direction/concept... not for the song.

I remember seeing this video a relatively long time ago, and I don't remember noticing all the commotion in the background too.

Tags: kylie minogue, come into my world, michel gondry, repetition, multiple passes

What Kanye West's Twitter Account Says About Him

Yesterday, Semaj mentioned that Kanye West had started a Twitter account, and the account does tell the essential tale of what Mr. West is about.



Basically, he just talks about himself and doesn't want to or care to hear what anyone else has to say.

I just wish that a large group of people would trend or @kanyewest messages that relate him to the South Park fishsticks joke. That would make my day.

Tags: kanye west, twitter, selfish, south park, fishsticks, trending

MGM Financial Situation has One Positive Outcome

With the financial problems facing MGM putting the James Bond franchise on ice, it seems that their woes have had a detriment to filmgoers everywhere. However, it does seem there is something positive coming out of this mess as well.

It seems that the Robocop remake has also gone down for the count because of MGM's money problems.

My long personal nightmare has for the moment ended and for that I am grateful.

But now I have to worry about the next time someone tries to resurrect Robocop. Because we all know it is going to come sooner rather than later because people just can't leave well enough alone.

So, how long do you think it is going to be until we are hearing rumors about the next Robocop reboot? I am betting it is going to be 18 months.

Tags: mgm, james bond, robocop, reboot, darren aronofsky, financial problems, remake

Well, this puts Snoopy and Woodstock in an entirely different light

So that's how they would look in a more realistic light.



via I Can Has Internets.

Tags: snoopy, charles schultz, charlie brown, woodstock, dog house

Amanda Bynes: Tut, Tut, Tut

Do you remember when I wrote about celebrities retiring and then not following through with it?

Amanda Bynes is the textbook case for this.

Did anyone who cared actually think she had retired? Honestly.

Like I said... if you are going to retire, you just retire. You don't make a production about it... you just stop taking work. It is as simple as that.

Personally, I think it was just a ploy for attention or work (because you make people want to get you to come out of retirement with the right role).

I mean, she did Maxim a few months back and then she mysteriously decides she is going to retire. Who does that?

The only explanation that I think is plausible is that she was having a nervous breakdown, which happens, and if that was revealed at some point, I would totally buy that.

As it stands, she just seems flaky now.

Tags: amanda bynes, retirement, flaky, nervous breakdown, maxim, celebrity, bah, attention-seeking behavior

Sunday Night Video: Hard Day's Night of the Living Dead

Classic. All I have to say.

Tags: hard day's night, shaun of the dead, dawn of the dead, romero, the beatles

Week 11: Pageant of the Transmundane

A bear in Colorado snuck into an empty car, honked the horn and then knocked it into neutral, taking a 125 foot joyride. I wonder if Dante and Randall were in the backseat anime style yelling. It also did something else which changes what the question "Does a bear crap in the woods?" means.

This week's winning entry comes to us from Calvin's Canadian Cave of Coolness.

Kal recently posted a picture which leaves me with a lot of questions. It isn't totally surreal... it is just weird.

I mean, really, who ties a calf to a bike rack? I would love to hear the story of how that happened. I mean, did someone ride the calf to that location? Is it a prank? And notice how the calf is in that rack too. It is all just so very strange.

And because this week's winning entry has to do with a cow, well, of course, Homer Simpson battling with a cow would seem to be the most appropriate expression of this win.



Congrats Kal. Here is your badge.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: pageant of the transmundane, calvin's canadian cave of coolness, homer simpson, calf, cow, tomacco, bear, clerks, bike rack

Friday Favorite: What is Hollywood Ugly?

I totally remember when I wrote this. I had just seen previews for a show that was coming for the fall of 2006 called Betty the Ugly and I was absolutely outraged.

We all know what happened that fall after I watched that very same program. Yeah, I ate a lot of crow about that one.

But this was short and sweet, and for the most part, it still applies today. (And I think this may have been the only time Celeste in the City has ever been publicly mentioned)

--
You know there is something wrong in Hollywood when this is "ugly".

This was an entry that was a long time in coming, but what was the last straw was the previews for Betty the Ugly I've been seeing lately. I know that the point of the show, much like The Devil Wears Prada(I know that picture is from the Princess Diaries) and Celeste in the City is about women who are overcoming the rigors of a publishing world that is aligned against them, but I still saddens me that a certain look has been deemed by Hollywood as their conception of ugly, especially since the characters they play are all genuinely kind and lovable people. I mean those are qualities we generally want in people we want to be around.

There is just something that rubs me the wrong way about this whole beauty standard. I mean, the actress playing the title role in Betty the Ugly also starred in the critically acclaimed film Real Women have Curves. I am trying to think of young women in the movies who were referred to as "ugly" that were in fact ugly, and I am having a hard time doing it. I even think independent movies get in on this act too.

But it seems that satirically minded people have picked up on this trend too. For example, I remember an episode of the Simpsons where Moe Sylak was auditioning for for a soap opera and he is rejected because the director wanted someone who was Hollywood ugly, not "ugly ugly".

I am just wondering if there will ever be a day in Hollywood where more normal looking people are part of the mix once again. Of course, that day will be right after allreality shows pick totally normal looking casts as well, because we all know that the people they select for those are totally representative of the population at large. *rolleyes*

Tags: betty, ugly, america ferrera, anne hathaway, majandra delfino, devil wears prada, princess diaries, moe syzlak, simpsons, real women have curves, real world, survivor

No. Not Another Remake

Do you remember that horrific Eddie Murphy movie The Haunted Mansion?



OK, you probably don't because either you didn't see it or if you did, your brain has spared you having to remember it to prevent you from going insane, which I have now reminded you of, for which I apologize, but there is a good reason.

You see, there is going to be a Haunted Mansion remake. In 3D. The horror... the horror.

But it is going to be directed by Guillermo Del Toro and he doesn't want Eddie Murphy. Woot?

Can it be good now? I don't know. However, I am rooting for a huge Ron Perlman part... because that guy is awesome.

I mean, when they needed someone to replace Bruce Campbell as Elvis, you just can't get anyone. So they got the awesomeness of Ron Perlman. So maybe he will end up in The Haunted Mansion after all.

Tags: guillermo del toro, eddie murphy, haunted mansion, remake, 3d, elvis, bubba, remake, blight

Midweek Video: Tom's Diner

It is refreshing to hear this in its acapella version. I didn't know this version existed in video form. Every time you look up this song on Youtube, the version with DNA is the only one that pops up along with some concert versions.

I always liked Suzanne Vega.

Tags: youtube, suzanne vega, acapella, tom's diner, live, concert, dna, original video

Have You Read GQ's Bill Murray Interview?

It is epic.

The fact that Quick Change comes up on two non-consecutive occasions in the interview, and to me, that is one of his most underrated movies (and one of my favorite all time films).

And like a lot of his other media appearances, he really dishes some dirt. It is refreshing to see someone just come out and say things and not apologize for it. More people should do that, because sometimes the nasty thing has to be said.

Bill Murray is still a curmudgeon, but he is my kind of curmudgeon.

Awesome stuff as always. But would you expect anything less from the legend?

Tags: bill murray, quick change, gq, interview, ghostbusters, dirt, gossip, curmudgeon

Thought Experiment: The Big Lebowski recast

Last week, the crew at the Midnight Movie Club watched Major League, and during the conversation, they mentioned something which started to tickle the back of my brain.

They noted the similarities between Sam Elliott and the man who played the coach in Major League, the late James Gammon, and my mind started to put together an alternate casting of a classic movie.

I am talking about The Big Lebowski.

Now I should note, this is a thought experiment and nothing more. I am completely satisfied with the casting as it stands now, and this is merely some idle speculation.

The only limitations I put on this was the actors in question had to be in a position to take that role when the movie was in production. That means that they had to be active in Hollywood to be chosen. And some of the choices do have some experience with the Coens too, which doesn't hurt.

And I know that some of the choices that came up when I was putting this together are going to rub some people the wrong way (I have a feeling my Dude is going to really have some people scratching their heads as well).

But in the end, this was a fun little experiment, one which I may do in the future (in addition to a few more "If I wrote/cast (blank)" posts).

The Stranger: Originally played by Sam Elliott. Alternate, the aforementioned late James Gammon.



Jeffery Lebowski: originally played by David Huddleston. In this version, M. Emmet Walsh.



Brandt: originally played by Philip Seymour Hoffman. Alternate: Brendan Fraser.



Bunny Lebowski: Originally played by Tara Reid. Alternate, Marley Shelton.



Jesus Quintana: originally played by John Turturro. Alternate casting: John Leguizamo.



Donny Kerabatsos: played by Steve Buscemi. Alternate: William H. Macy.



Walter Sobchak: played by John Goodman. In this version, Samuel L. Jackson.




The Dude: originally completely inhabited by Jeff Bridges, recast as Christopher Walken.



I think in this experiment, The Big Lebowski becomes a little angrier and a little twitchier, which could work. But I still love it the way it is now.

Tags: the big lebowski, james gammon, major league, midnight movie club, the dude, jeff bridges, bunny lebowski, tara reid, jennifer jason leigh, christopher walken, samuel l jackson, john goodman

Sunday Video: The Philosophy Teacher

I like some of the twists and turns in this short little video.

Bravo!

I don't know why I am getting an Edgar Wright vibe from it though. Interesting.

Tags: funny or die, philosophy teacher, spaced, edgar wright

Week 10: Pageant of the Transmundane

The Madrid Zoo wants to buy the World Cup predicting octopus for its collection after it successfully called for a Spanish victory in the tournament. The zoo has pledged to not use the 8-legged crustean's gifts for prognostication again. (Well, that is until they show it the financial pages and have it pick stocks... you knoe they are thinking it).

This week, we had quite a battle between two different entries, both of which were comic strips.

However, after weighing the options, one of the two was superior based on its brevity and timeless nature. So without further ado, the winner is...

...Samuraifrog of Electronic Cerebrectomy fame.

And as I have already indicated, it is a comic. In this case, it is a comic about Pokemon employing an infectious meme, so it is a perfectly blended ha moment.

And the image that accompanies this winning entry may take some explaining. The following image is from The Simpsons episode "Thirty Minutes over Tokyo", and the action being depicted is the family going into seizures because of a particular work of anime on the television, which was a joke about an infamous Pokemon episode which had the same effect. So this is perhaps the most fitting image I've had in a while.



Congrats Aaron. You know the drill. Here is your badge.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: electronic cerebrectomy, homer simpson, thirty minutes over tokyo, pageant of the transmundane, aaron davis, pokemon, csi miami, seizures, sunglasses, octopus, world cup, madrid zoo

I think they are going to need a bigger boat

I wonder if he is filled with furious anger.

Tags: jaws, roy scheider, chum, bigger boat, jules winnfield, samuel l. jackson, shark, deep blue sea, brody

My Favorite Headline of the Week

Nic Cage Makes Good on His Threat to Punish Us with 'Ghost Rider 2'

I think that Cinematical headline condenses my entire feeling about this.

My question is, will it be as bad as The Wicker Man... or The Fantastic Four 2.

Tags: wicker man, nicolas cage, ghost rider 2, fantastic four 2, rise of the silver surfer, cinematical.

The Geek Phonetic Alphabet

By now, I think we have all heard parts of the ICAO spelling alphabet in a movie or on a television show. If you've ever watched a work of fiction based on police work or military operations, then you've likely heard someone spell out something in the following way.

Charlie-Romeo-Yankee Bravo-Alpha-Bravo-Yankee

Well, I thought it would be funny to see if I could geek that system up a bit for the pop culturally obsessed bunch. I think I did pretty well, but I admit that there were some challenging letters, and I am more than willing to take suggestions.

I also tried to pick just one item from each franchise/grouping of characters... so there is for instance, only one choice from the DC and Marvel Universes respectively.

Ash
Buffy
Chocobo
Dalek
Elvis
Frodo
Godzilla
Hurley
Indy
Joker
Kirk
Lebowski
Mario
Neo
Obi-Wan
Potter
Quentin
Rincewind
Starbuck
Trillian
Ulysses
Venture
Wolverine
Xena
Yakko
Zoidberg

So, what do you think?

Tags: ash, buffy, chocobo, dalek, elvis, frodo, godzilla, hurley, indy, kirk, joker, lebowski, mario, neo, obi-wan, potter, quentin, rincewind, starbuck, trillian, ulysses, venture, wolverine, xena, yakko, zoidberg, nato phonetic alphabet, icao, charlie, romeo, yankee, bravo, alpha

Missing my Peers

You ever have one of those weeks where you look back nostalgically at your recent past. Well, I was doing that earlier this week.

In particular, I just started thinking about all of my fellow blogging peers that have fallen by the wayside over the years, and in retrospect, it was a fairly long list of people. And it made me sort of depressed to think about all those voices which are now silenced or for all I know, they are merely blogging under a different moniker about a totally different topic these days. After all, I am certainly familiar with doing that myself.

But sometimes you never realize how many people you miss talking to on a semi-regular basis until it is too late. I've lost touch with some many great people over the years, and I sort of wish I knew what they were up to now. Granted, in most cases, I only knew the little bit of themselves that they let show online, but still, they were almost always captivating personalities. I am not going to name names or blogs however... because then I would be listing all day.

And I think that is why I got so upset about all those old comments from my first six months at Culture Kills disappearing... because a lot of the people who left them no longer blog, so when I would repost some of my old entries, I could read their comments and think back to how things used to be here. It was usually an entertaining trip down memory lane. But I have to accept that those comments are likely gone forever.

On some level, it has made me question my own blogging longevity. I mean, how have I managed to blog for so long while other more talented and prolific people didn't make it? Because deep down, I think most of what I write these days is sort of terrible (and that isn't a ploy to get some sympathy comments). Somewhere along the line, I feel like I lost some of my original spark.

I wonder if I will ever feel the same exhilaration I did when I started this blog at some point.

Tags: blogging, blogger, longevity, spark, closed, end of the road, peers, collaboration

Cutrate Cultural Analysis: California Gurls

It is no secret that I am not a fan of Katy Perry's music. It is a little too overprocessed for my tastes, and I know there are a lot of other people out there who feel the same.

I thought I could do everyone a public service if rather than making you all watch that video, I would visually recreate it using pop cultural images that came up from my mind when I first watched that matched either in movement or implication, what was going on during the video.

Is it perfect? No. I admit that there are a few bare spots (no pun intended), but I think for the most part, I got the essence of the video down with all these images.

So now you don't have to watch it but you still have an idea of its content. You can thank me later.




















































































Does it make sense? It does to me.

Tags: snoop dogg, california gurls, katy perry, huey lewis, shrek, gingerbread man, tim curry, wilderness girls, christina aguilera, genie in a bottle, jello, slimer, ghostbusters, john spartan, demolition man, wizard of oz, bubble girl, david lee roth, victoria's secret, barbie girl, natalie portman, closer, snakes on a plane, ali larter, whip cream bikini, varsity blues, kate pierson, zooey deschanel, absolut, noodles, umi, poison ivy, homer simpson, land of chocolate, simpsons game, black hole sun, cloudy with a chance of meatballs, gummi bears, last crusade, step of faith, yellow brick road, calvin and hobbes, water balloons, madonna, tank girl, missile bra, bettie page, laura palmer, twin peaks, imaginationland, south park, bunny lebowski, sailor moon, thriller, achy breaky heart, wave babies