Great Commentary Tracks?

I know this isn't really a post, but I am always on the look out for great commentary tracks on DVDs. I recently got through an excellent one on Hot Fuzz between Edgar Wright and Quentin Tarantino which was sort of like a podcast broke out, with the movie being incidental.

I also liked the commentary track for Dude, Where's My Car which saves that crappy movie.

So are there any other epic (in terms of being entertaining) commentary tracks that you think I should be looking out for?

Tags: commentary tracks, hot fuzz, epic commentary, edgar wright, danny leiner, quentin tarantino

Remakes, Sequels and Prequels: Oh My

So there are going to be a film prequel to The Wizard of Oz and two for Alien, but somehow we can't get a sequel with all the main participants for Anchorman, even though a lot of people are willing to take pay cuts to be a part of it? For shame, shame.

Oh, and I should quote myself here from an entry I did a few weeks ago called Hollywood is Developmentally Challenged.

Seriously, there should be a position on every Hollywood executives staff for someone who sole job is to smack them upside the head when they suggest something like "Let's remake Commando!" And not a light slap either.... that person should have to put some weight behind it. I am sure there are a lot of unemployed former college athletes who would jump at the chance to pop someone in the back of the head every time they suggested a meritless remake.

Why did I go back to that entry? Well, they are indeed remaking Commando.

You know, when I say that someone shouldn't remake something, I am not using reverse psychology. I really mean that someone should get hit very hard in the back of the head when they make suggestions like that.



I mean, if it was The Running Man, I could see that one getting a remake because that one aged really badly and it is different from the source material, but come on, Commando still holds up remarkably well.

BAH!

Tags: commando, alien, wizard of oz, anchorman, will ferrell, prequel, sequel, arnold, arnie, schwartzenegger, running man, remake

Hobo With a Shotgun: Full Length Movie being Filmed

I love Hobo with a Shotgun with a white hot intensity, and after I saw that trailer, I kept saying to myself and anyone who would listen that they had to make it. It was something that the world needed. It was an entry into the SXSW Grindhouse contest, and it was one of the winners.

As a Canadian, I could tell that trailer was made in this country from the accents alone.

And now they've started filming it with Rutger Hauer in the lead! I'm so excited. I think I am more excited about this movie than I am about the upcoming Machete movie.

Put it this way, I actually cheered when he shot the child predator in the Santa suit. I mean really, who objects to child molestors and such getting killed in movies. It is like seeing Nazis and zombies getting shot... you don't feel really bad seeing it happen most of the time.

That being said, I am wondering if some of the really insane stuff for near the end of the trailer is going to make the final cut of the real movie, because that is where it seems to get a lot more interesting. I admit the chiselling of the teeth is really hard to watch, and I wonder in what context that would happen in the finished product.

Well, truth be told, I have a lot of questions, and I want the answers to them, so perhaps that is the reason I want to see that trailer become a movie.

Or it could be that I just like seeing vigilante action against bad people.

Yeah, I think it's that.

Tags: hobo with a shotgun, rutger hauer, nazis, zombies, vigilante, trailer, grind house, sxsw

A Culture Kills Comics experiment

Last week, I was visiting Popped Culture where there was an entry about a little movement (spurred on by a New Yorker-based experiment) that you could replace the punchline of a comic with the phrase "Christ, What an asshole" and it would still work.

I thought it would be interesting to see if I could randomly pick some of my own comics and see if the principle works.

Before:


After:


Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Well, for an unscientific poll, those aren't bad results. Granted, not every comic punch line can so easily be substituted. Hard to believe there was actually a time when I could write occasionally funny comics.

Tags: culture kills comics, strip generator, flickr, christ, punchline, popped culture, new yorker, thought experiment, comic strip

Sunday Video: MST3K and the Many Names of David Ryder

On Wednesday, I posted a voiceover clip which I said should get the Mystery Science Theater 3000 treatment, and it got me to thinking about that show, and one of my favorite episodes, the one they did on a little 1988 movie called Space Mutiny.

I was just going to pick a random clip, but someone has done something interesting... they've gathered all the various names the MST3K crew gave the movie's character throughout the movie, and it works spectacularly.

I literally laughed so hard, I was tearing up.

Tags: space mutiny, bad voiceover, chaos wars, mystery science theater 3000, mst3k, david ryder

Week 50: Pageant of the Transmundane

Apparently there is going to be an openly gay character in Archie comics. Somehow I think we all have a good idea of which character is coming out of the closet... he already wears a crown and has little interest in the gals, so... wait, they are introducing a new character to be the gay guy? But all the pieces fit together... DOH! I wonder how long that character is going to last.

This week's winning entry comes to us from the blog Forces of Geek.

This time around, it is a group of amazing Lego creations, some from pop culture. They all look like they were all so time consuming to make.

And strangely enough, the most appropriate image this week comes from the very entry I am celebrating. How very meta.



Congrats to the staff of Forces of Geek (as I can't readily identify who the submitting party is).



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: archie comics, homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, jughead, lego, forces of geek, homosexuality, gay

Roger Ebert Again Claims Games Can Never Be Art

Back in 2007, when Roger Ebert and Clive Barker were having a discussion about the merits of video games as a potential art form, I started writing a very detailed passionate defense of games as art as an open letter, but as it kept building and time continued to pass, it seemed like it really was beating a dead horse.

Recently Roger Ebert revisited the topic, and he hasn't changed his mind and I opened that long-lost blog post, and started writing it anew. But in the process, I came to a realization: there is nothing I can say that will change Roger Ebert's mind, even if he were to read my words. His mind is made up.

Because frankly, how can you have an open discussion with someone about the present and future merits of a something as an art form if they refuse to take the time to experience that medium.

As long as there is a great movie unseen or a great book unread, I will continue to be unable to find the time to play video games.

And it is his prerogative not to play games. However, commenting on their merit as artistic creations without playing any, well, that is where I think the problem with his entries on the subject lies.

For instance, if I stated that film could never be art, and I refused to watch any, and I took any suggestions you might make for films to watch to try to change my opinion and I just continue to stonewall you and make the same claim, well, clearly I don't want to change my mind. And you would probably discount anything I said about that particular topic.

Clive Barker had called Ebert prejudiced because of his opinion back in 2007, which the elder critic took to mean they were just disagreeing, but that is clearly not the case. It really is a prejudice.

a. An adverse judgment or opinion formed beforehand or without knowledge or examination of the facts.
b. A preconceived preference or idea.

And again, that is ok. He is allowed to have that opinion. But it is admittedly biased and it is right to call him out on it based on those grounds.

I haven't appreciated the tone that has continued to pop up whenever he discusses this topic either. True, I am sure Roger Ebert has received a lot of angry emails and many horrific insults based on his opinions, but I don't think in general, people who have the opposing opinion as a whole deserved the increasingly condescending attitude that he has consistently shown the issue.

However, something wonderful keeps happening every time Roger Ebert proclaims that games can never be art. People who are more familiar with the breadth of medium push back and we end up discussing the matter not only with him, but with each other, sometimes in insulting ways, but often times, there is respectful conversation.

The strange thing is, in the midst of all that discussion, somehow a group of people who have trouble agreeing on anything time and time again keep coming to the same conclusions about which titles should be considered the artistic triumphs of the medium. And the funny thing is, they aren't all blockbuster games that everyone has played, and yet they keep coming up. So, in repeatedly coming out against games as an art form, he is causing those that do believe they are to become more vocal about their beliefs and in some small way, helping the community and a canon to develop.

I have a strange feeling that every one of the games that is slowly becoming the canon was at one point suggested numerous times to Ebert by those who wanted to show him an experience that he might understand as "art".

So even though many of us are upset by Roger Ebert's stance, in a way, he has ended up helping us all by giving us something to rally against together as a community.

But I think Charlie Brooker has really gotten a good bead on this whole issue... and he wasn't even directly addressing Roger Ebert:

And games are the equivalent of Esperanto-language movies – except they're better than movies. They're engrossing and exciting, playful and challenging, constantly evolving, constantly surprising. They're interactive and, thanks to the rise of modern multiplayer, infinitely more social than mere television. But because they're in Esperanto, it's hard for non-speakers to appreciate them.

If you don't play games, you're not just missing out, you're wilfully ignoring the most rapidly evolving creative medium in human history.

I think that is better than any parting shot I could think of.

Tags: roger ebert, charlie brooker, clive barker, video games, art, esperanto, canon

Midweek Video: Bad Voice Acting *shudder*

OK, picking on video game voice over work is like shooting fish in a barrel, because there is a lot of terrible work in that field.

And then you see/hear something that gives you a lot of perspective about how bad it can be.

I saw some of the English voice work for a PS2 game called Chaos Wars.

The voice work (and let's be frank, the translated script) are so bad, it boggles the mind how anyone involved could have heard what was being produced and thought "You know, this sounds great!"

For those of you who don't play games, this is even worth your attention, because it is so bad it deserves a Mystery Science Theater 3000 treatment.

I mean, the above voice acting makes Troll 2 look like Citizen Kane.

See, the problem is, the people who did the voice over work, were friends and family of the CEO of the company doing the localization. I don't know how they could have put the game together, listened to that and thought it was acceptable.

I mean, were their no colleges around their offices... because I am sure they could have put up some flyers in a couple of drama departments to get some people who would have loved to have a credit for their resume to open some doors after graduation.

You know things are bad when even I am listening to the caliber of work that was produced and saying that I could do a better job.

I couldn't even get through it in one go... so I can't imagine trying to tackle the game itself with the English Voice Acting if I owned it. Though, I heard that it comes with the Japanese VA with English subs, so that would probably work out a lot better. At the very least, if you didn't understand Japanese, you probably couldn't tell if the acting was good or not. From what I understand, on that side of the Pacific, they actually gave a shit about the voice work.

Tags: chaos wars, mystery science theater 3000, bad voice acting, citizen kane, troll 2

You Know Things Are Bad When Even Your Dreams Have In-Jokes

The whole dream isn't important to this story... just one small aspect which stuck with me.

In the dream, me and my friend were in a book store, and my friend was listening to an audio book called "The Simpsons with Descriptions for the Visually Impaired by Charlton Heston", and I asked them if I could listen to it, and it was the scene from the episode Last Exit to Springfield which leads up to Homer punching Lenny in the back of the head. The audio is the 12th entry on that page.



So I heard that clip and then Charlton Heston saying "Homer got the Comeuppance he sought".

Upon waking and thinking about the dream, I realized that it was in fact Phil Hartman doing his impression of Charlton Heston, one which he had done on The Simpsons, including an episode called "A Star is Burns".

Why do I mention that particular episode? Well, one of the last things I watched last night was The Critic, and Jay Sherman happened to be a guest character on that episode of The Simpsons.

And it in general, the above dream sequence was very much like a joke that someone would have written for an episode of The Simpsons.

At least the Comic Book Guy didn't show up and tell me "Worst Dream Ever".

Tags: comic book guy, the simpsons, charlton heston, a star is burns, the critic, jay sherman, last exit to springfield, phil hartman, worst dream ever, descriptive video, visual impaired

James Bond Delayed... Indefinitely

You know, when I said that I was unhappy with the prospects of Lady Gaga doing the next Bond theme, I didn't really want that outcome to be stopped this way.

Yes, because the future of MGM, which is 3.7 billion dollars in debt is currently unresolved, series producers Michael G. Wilson and Barbara Broccoli have put the series on indefinite hiatus.

Now, I don't think this is going to be the same kind of indefinite hiatus that I always take to mean a band has almost certainly broken up permanently.

I fully expect that there will be another James Bond movie. They are too profitable not to reemerge at some point in the future.

I could have made a martini or Bond title pun somewhere in all this, but I've left you all traumatized by yesterday's geekypic, so I thought better of it.

Tags: lady gaga, james bond, daniel craig, sleater kinner, barbara broccoli, michael g wilson, mgm, debt, indefinite hiatus

He Does Not Take A Good Picture

Sortly after this picture was taken, Carrot Top ate that little bunny after a fit of 'roid rage.

Tags: carrot top, bunny eater

Sunday Video: A New TV Edit Classic

TV dialogue edits are sometimes good for a laugh. And I found a new classic to add to the pantheon of interesting choices: Snakes on a Plane.

I think this is in the same class as The Big Lebowski's "This is what happens when you Find a stranger in the Alps!" and one of my personal favorites "Die Screaming My old Friend" from A Long Kiss Goodnight.

I think I would have went with Mighty Fine for the second one in that clip. But that is just me.

Tags: samuel l jackson, snakes on a plane, a long kiss goodnight, the big lebowski, tv edit

Week 49: Pageant of the Transmundane

The country of Norway was run via an iPad by its president while he was stranded at a US airport due to the Icelandic Volcanic eruption. Well, I am sure Apple was happy about that story coming out.

This week's winning entry comes to us from the Epic Fail blog.

It is a video of a kid playing the Wii. He falls over, and then something nasty happens to him... but he continues to keep playing... and his guardian keeps filming rather than helping him.

It lives up to the Epic Fail moniker.

And because I don't want to wreck the surprise of what the nasty thing that befalls that child, so I have gone with a Homer Simpson image that is more in keeping with the game that is being played.



Congrats to the staff of Epic Fail.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: epic fail, homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, nintendo wii, first person shooter, fps, ipad, norway, volcano

Friday Script Frenzy Feedings 3: What I am watching

For the third week of the Script Frenzy contest, I am emphasizing comedy for the timing.

Hot Fuzz
Shaun of the Dead
Zombie Land
Superbad
Animal House

I'm giddy.

Tags: hot fuzz, script frenzy, shaun of the dead, zombie land, superbad, animal house

On the End of Ugly Betty

So, if it isn't apparent from the title, I will be discussing the ending of Ugly Betty, and if you haven't watched the final episode the series, well, then perhaps you shouldn't read this until you come back.

On the whole, I was satisfied with the conclusion of the show, although one thought did come to mind.

There was one character I think I would have brought back for the finale if it had been up to me, and it is probably not the one you may suspect.

I think that the producers should have brought Cliff St. Paul back. Think about it... Marc was just getting a grip on his own neuroses regarding relationships, and Cliff was his first serious boyfriend on the show. And as we know, it was Marc's fear of commitment that led him to throw it away with a cheap one night stand, so a reintroduction at the end would have been, to me at least, a great ending for the character. Yes, the reconcilation with Troy was ok, but let's face it, Marc was never committed to that relationship either.

And I wasn't upset with how the Daniel/Betty dynamic played out, and that was something that I was worried about.

I mean, she was upset that he wasn't at her going away party, but her consternation was explained slightly earlier in that segment of the show in a chat between Claire Meade and herself, where she wondered if Daniel was mad at her and Claire indicated but did not outright say that Daniel might be in love with Betty... she let Betty put those pieces together. And he let her go to London without expressing his feelings for her.

And in the end, Betty was true to herself and embarked on an adventurous and successful new life in London. Eventually she bumped into Daniel (who had given up his job at Mode to Wilhelmina because it was the right thing to do at that moment) in Trafalgar Square and they agree to go to dinner. There was no kissing, no admission of feelings... just an open ending. We just know that Daniel digs her and at no point was their any real indication that she reciprocated, so nothing seemed forced.

It was an ending that didn't wreck the show, and when I read rumors that Silvio Horta wanted the ending to be Betty and Daniel becoming a couple, I had grave doubts, because nothing up to that point had been leading to that... and the ambiguity worked because it didn't force them together, but if something was to happen, well, it doesn't seem strange.

I also have to mention I liked some of the references to the first episode, like the talk on the stoop between Justin and Betty and the red type overlay of "Ugly Betty" at the very end (which in the finale then lost the word "Ugly")

I don't think any one of the main characters got screwed in the end... so it was a happy, happy ending for everyone involved. Even the fact that Ignatio is going to be living in an empty nest is tempered with the thought that his children and grandchild are entering a new world and that he was instrumental in helping that happen.

There are rumors that there may be a movie coming, but I don't think there really needs to be one. I was satisfied with how that ended.

Tags: ugly betty, betty suarez, marc st james, cliff st paul, abc, finale, satisfaction, uncouple, daniel mease, claire meade, ignatio, wilhelmina, movie

Hollywood is Developmentally Challenged

This one is going to have a lot of swearing in it. I am giving you fair warning because, let's face it, this is a relatively rare event. And this is also a fairly long entry, but the fact that I am swearing should indicate that this is one of those posts where I rant... and those are always fun.

As you are probably well aware, I am not a huge fan of remakes. OK, that is the understatement of the year. Hell, I worked with some of you on a blog that examined that issue as its first case.

Anyway, I flipped on Nightline last night, and the subject at hand was some of the upcoming remakes that Hollywood has up its sleeve.

The first name they threw out there was Real Genius.

MOTHERFUCKER!

And then they said there were plans to remake Overboard.

Hollywood, you absolute cocksuckers!

Now, I want names. I want the fucking names of the shit-eating morons who thought this was a good idea. I want the names of everyone involved in this process, because they deserve retribution, starting with a full round of overnight hanging wedgies.

Because really, someone who suggested that the world needed a remake of Overboard needs to be examined by mental health professionals because it is completely superfluous to put it kindly. To not put it kindly, it is a fucking stupid idea. No one is asking for it, no one was begging for this to happen. It is beyond stupid.

I have two theories about how this happened. Either someone jokingly suggested the remake and then to their horror discovered that his or her superiors loved that idea, or someone hates humanity so much that they feel they need to suffer through a glossier, intellectually bankrupt version of the same story with a younger cast (because you know that is going to be part of the deal). And I have a feeling they were somehow the same person who suggested an American remake of Spaced.

And the Real Genius one... that one hurts my soul. I would pay seven to ten dollars to see a short film made up entirely of footage of the execs behind that move being tied to chairs and punched in the face repeatedly by Martha Coolidge, Val Kilmer, William Atherton and the rest of the cast and crew of the original. I might even spring for an extra 3 to 5 bucks if their were some groin kicks in 3D or those involved recreated the famous fax machine beating from Office Space with said executives.

I mean, why? There are no scripts in the slush pile? There isn't one semi-original idea out there that could possibly be done instead of this? Dammit, you are telling me that there isn't a script floating around about a group of smart kids in college who do amusing things? Are you fucking kidding me? There isn't one? Or are you too brain-dead and lackidasical at your job that you didn't ask one of your readers if they had perhaps seen something like that? Hell, you could probably just reach into the slush pile and pull three of those out of there and a buddy cop movie just for shits and giggles. I mean, really, if someone thought putting out Annapolis was a good idea, then sure as shit developing movies at random from the pile would net more interesting results than what you are doing now.

There is a remake of House Party in the works as well. For Fuck's Sake why? I mean, if Robin Harris was still alive, he would be administering a beating upon the assholes who suggested this which would rival anything Mike Tyson did in the ring.

There are a lot of jokes about where in the world people should stick an enema tube, but at the moment, aside from any place political decisions are made, Hollywood needs it the most, because there are so many heads lodged up that collective asshole, it is likely the only way anyone involved in some of these decisions will ever see the light of day with their own two eyes again.

And given that analogy, it makes sense that Hollywood makes a lot of shitty movies, because if all you see, taste and smell is shit for long enough, I guess it starts to look palatable.

Seriously, there should be a position on every Hollywood executives staff for someone who sole job is to smack them upside the head when they suggest something like "Let's remake Commando!" And not a light slap either.... that person should have to put some weight behind it. I am sure there are a lot of unemployed former college athletes who would jump at the chance to pop someone in the back of the head every time they suggested a meritless remake.

And the thing that makes me weep is people will go see these movies and this pattern is going to keep repeating until there is nothing left, because just because they haven't yet remade your favorite movies doesn't mean they won't do it at some point.

See, this is why we as a culture can't have anything nice... because stupid assholes keep trying to remake those things and fucking them up. Because they rarely do a good job of it, and when you tell someone you like a movie, they think you are talking about the piece of shit remakes. Some of you have to have had a similar experience with at least one person in your life, it can't just be me.

I remember telling someone that I loved Rollerball, and they gave me a look like I was fucking insane... because they only knew of the shitty version with Chris "Balsa Wood" Klein (because he is wood, but he is as lightweight as they come) and Jean "I Used to Do Good Movies, but Now, Not So Much" Reno. And this is going to keep happening. And I fucking loathe it.

Now, there is a fanboy mantra that gets chanted whenever the community doesn't like something. The franchise, company or particular person "raped their childhood." I am not going to use that phrase, because frankly, I saw the "good" version of most of these remade films (and thank you Hollywood for forcing me to call some rather mediocre films from the 1970's and 80's the good version, because they have fucked up remake after remake). No, I am worried about the children, because they are now living in a fucked up world where these shitty remakes are their version of the story, and who is thinking about them. Don't they deserve quality, original (or at least slightly derivative) entertainment too. Who is looking out for their interests in this matter?

We all know those who are seemingly advocating to protect them from immortality on the screen and in music certainly aren't writing letters and organizing boycotts to save them from the soul crushing disappointment of another studio ripping off its own legacy to serve them a steaming shit sandwich (now in 3D!). If any one of these groups got behind stopping the remakes, then maybe I would be willing to listen to their other assinine assertions that the fact that the book How to Eat Fried Worms is going to lead a generation of kids to become gay Wiccan commie serial killers who will destroy America.

If I was conspiratorially minded, I might even be willing to see this whole exercise not as some crass profit driven ploy by the studios to soak every dollar from the worldwide viewing audience (who don't feel bad for stealing from them because with all these remakes, they are stealing from themselves anyway), but rather this whole thing is the most comprehensive education on the world that man or machine has devised for teaching kids about the world. They should see that the world is a cold, cynical place that attacks innovative thinking and rewards the same shit over and over. And the lessons they learn from watching remake after remake prepares them for the shitstorm that is politics too.

But that is giving everyone involved a lot more credit than they deserve.

Tags: real genius, movie executives, slush pile, house party, overboard, commando, enema, developmentally challenged, office space, william atherton, val kilmer, martha coolidge, robin harris, jean reno, rollerball, spaced, how to eat fried worms, wicca

This 3D Mess Has Got To Go... Hey Hey, Ho Ho

Yes, you can accuse me of jumping on a bandwagon, I have to talk about this move by Hollywood to once again bring back 3D by shoe horning a lot of movies into the format.

We've already survived other periods for craptacular 3D, and because theatres and the studios get a premium for showing the movie in 3D even if they aren't shot in a way that makes converting them worth the effort.

You know there is something shoddy with the process when even Michael Bay is against it. "Right now, it looks like fake 3D, with layers that are very apparent. You go to the screening room, you are hoping to be thrilled, and you’re thinking, huh, this kind of sucks. People can say whatever they want about my movies, but they are technically precise, and if this isn’t going to be excellent, I don’t want to do it. And it is my choice."

This is the same man who said, "We are entertainers, plain and simple, and we're responsible to bring that money back, to make a profit," so you know that if even profit-driven Michael Bay is recoiling at the thought that this process compromises his work as a filmmaker, there is a problem.

I mean, aside from a few event pictures, is anyone really clamoring for everything to be in 3D? I think it is a valid criticism that by applying the process to pictures that were never originally slated for that kind of treatment diminishes the effect, barring computer-animated pictures which transition to 3D much better than live action films shot with traditional cameras. I'm not against 3D as a process, but it should be used sparingly. The way the studios are trotting out these movies, they are quickly wearing out the gimmick's welcome with the movie going public.

I think it is funny looking back at 1983 with Siskel and Ebert looking at the stinkers of that year, and they started with a couple of the horrifying 3D movies from that year. We could see some more clunkers like that on a yearly basis now. And the fact that it costs between 9 and 15 million dollars to reprocess a movie to make it 3D makes this even more despairing, because I am sure there are a lot of smaller pictures that could be made with that kind of money which would end up being good risks for the studios.

I mean, I am loathe to imagine how far this trend could possibly go. I mean, does anyone need to see An Evening With Kevin Smith 4 in 3D? Or you could sign a petition for My Dinner with Andre in 3D... because why not given the logic of the studios these days.

So I implore you avoid movies in 3D if they were not shot in that process in mind or made from computer animated sources so the studios are more selective with how they use it.

Tags: avatar, michael bay, 3d, siskel and ebert, traditional effect, computer animation, my dinner with andre, an evening with kevin smith, 1983, profit, independent movies

Conan O'Brien signs with TBS

Those of you who have been following this blog this year know that I've been a rather vocal in my support of Conan O'Brien and was hoping he would return to television sooner rather than later.

The hope was that Fox and O'Brien would come to an arrangement and he would have a network platform to get his sweet, sweet revenge against Leno and NBC. But that wasn't to be.

Instead of hammering out a deal with Fox, O'Brien has made the move to TBS/Peachtree TV. From what I've read, there were numerous obstacles to a Fox deal, and in the end, Time Warner was both willing and able to offer financial compensation which really sweetened the pot.

To say the move was surprising is an understatement. Though the timing of the announcment, which corresponds to the start of O'Brien's national tour, couldn't be better.

"In three months, I've gone from network television to Twitter to performing live in theaters, and now I'm headed to basic cable. My plan is working perfectly."

Of course, there is a bit of history repeating itself in all this though. You see, for Conan to get the 11 PM slot, well, someone else is going to have to move their show to midnight. The difference is, Conan wouldn't agree to the deal and it took a phone call from George Lopez asking him to join the network that finally got him to agree. Or that is the official story according to Bill Carter, who is a man who has been in the know about late night television for decades now.

But I have a feeling this isn't the case, because Lopez was brutal regarding Conan O'Brien's plight at NBC, though how much of that was just comedy and how much was an accurate representation of Lopez's feelings may not be apparent.

Though, Conan is still tweaking his new network... as he is apt to do.

Via Twitter: "The good news: I will be doing a show on TBS starting in November! The bad news: I'll be playing Rudy on the all new Cosby Show."

Though seeing as The Cosby Show was an NBC mainstay, perhaps he is taking one last swipe at NBC selling out their franchises. Who knows.

I am sure Jon Stewart and Mr. Colbert are looking forward to the competition.

Tags: conan o'brien, george lopez, tbs, the tonight show, cosby show, daily show, jon stewart, stephen colbert, twitter. peachtree tv

Sunday Video: Dexter Theme Solo

I almost went with the Inspector Gadget theme, but this double neck masterpiece deserved it more. And it fits with last night's Pageant of the Transmundane.

Tags: dexter, inspector gadget, double neck guitar, pageant of the transmundane, virtuoso

Week 48: Pageant of the Transmundane

A Colorado police officer is currently on unpaid leave because he shocked around 30 students from a local high school during a job fair with a taser. Unlike a lot of other taser-related incidents, it looks like those students were asking for it. Literally. They were asking to be shocked just to know what it was like.

Part of me thinks that if you are asking a police officer to tase you, it will likely not be the last time you feel it.

Anyway, this week's winning entry comes from the blog, The Girl Gamer.

Christina found a t-shirt which riffs on two shows with a lead character named Dexter which is totally awesome. There should be more Dexter's Laboratory references in real life anyway.

And because this has to do with psychopathy, well, Homer Simpson recreating Jack Nicholson's iconic door-smashing scene from The Shining seemed to be the best fit.




Congrats Faith/Christina for this discovery.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, dexter, the girl gamer, christina winterburn, faith, dexter's lab, cartoon, t-shirt, the shining, tase me bro, cop suspended

Friday Script Frenzy Feedings 2: What I am watching

What is on the menu this week:

Army of Darkness
Razorback
Dawn of the Dead (classic)
Primeval
Them

Tags: script frenzy, them, army of darkness, razorback, dawn of the dead, primeval

Midweek Video: Travelling Riverside Blues

Well, I usually go for covers, and this qualifies.

I did travel down a street by that name today, and I am sort of blue, so it fits.

More movie-related talk tomorrow.

Tags: led zeppelin, travelling riverside blues, cover, movie, delta blues

Remembering Persona 3 / FES

Persona 3 and the special edition Persona 3 FES take on the trappings of a traditional console role playing game and introduce new elements which make it greater than the sum of its parts.

It is in many ways a very different RPG than a lot of its peers.

Combining traditional dungeon crawling with elements of a dating sim, which at first seems like an odd combination, but the two elements work well together, and aside from helping tell a great story, the dating/relationship system called Social Links also has in game benefits (which I will discuss later).

For instance, instead of being either a vaguely medieval/fantasy setting or a futuristic world, the game takes place in a modern Japanese urban setting between 2009 and 2010. This decision also means that instead of having the characters in the game travel around great distances, there is a single large dungeon which is accessible at a single time of the day called the Dark Hour. The Dark Hour is a secret time after midnight that the majority of humanity can't experience, but a few individuals can see and experience. Of course, the Dark Hour is also a time when demons called Shadows stalk the streets and attack those who can exist during that eldritch time.

This is related to another one of the odd things about the game: events are tied more to dates rather than places. As you progress through the game, you become aware of the fact that you are going to have major encounters on particular days, so you aren't surprised by a boss battle... you generally have a heads up about those kinds of things.

Now, I have to mention the fact that it is a very dark game, one which was almost tailor made for controversy. You see, the way the characters access their Personas is provocative. They each have something which looks like a pistol called an Evoker, which they put up to their head and pull the trigger. It is not suicide, but it is very much an emulation of it. The fact that the characters are all teenagers and there is a belief that games are just for kids means that yes, this is indeed pushing some boundaries. Penny Arcade even made light of that aspect of the game. Oddly enough, evoking is very similar to summoning in the Final Fantasy games, so aside from the methods, it is quite traditional in that one respect.

Then again, it isn't the first time that the Shin Megami Tensei series has pushed some buttons. They've had storylines which have included a cult trying to resurrect Hitler, a group of kids killing their principal (who was totally evil, but still), and had a game where the heroes didn't just kill "God", but killed the Judeo-Christian God.

So to say they aren't cute or happy games is an understatement. It is on more than one level depressing. I would not let little kids and young teens play this game (granted, they most likely wouldn't want to play it anyway), and it is a title which I agree with the M rating on, despite it being far less violent than other games out there for the system.

The story follows a group of Japanese high school students who discover that they can exist in the Dark Hour, and take it upon themselves to try to protect the world from the evils which that state is breeding (there is an in game disorder called Apathy Syndrome which is causing increasing numbers of people to become almost comatose). You play as a male tranfer student to Gekkoukan High School, silent protagonist, who discovers that like his fellow dorm mates, he has the ability to evoke a Persona during the Dark Hour (though unlike his classmates, he can access multiple Personas during a battle). You battle Shadows in a grand towering and ever changing dungeon called Tartarus which arises on the site of the High School.



As I mentioned earlier, this is not a role playing game based on travel, rather it is rooted in a single town which has a single large dungeon, and a few other places to visit. But instead of being a limitation, this economy of setting means that a better and more organic story can develop. Remember I mentioned that Persona 3 incorporated elements of dating sims into the game. Well, this means that you are encouraged to develop friendships and romantic relationships with classmates and people around town, and in doing so, over time and through repeated interactions, you learn that character's story, and often times, you help them come to a realization about themselves or see them through a great hardship. I mentioned that aside from being emotionally evocative, this also has an in game benefit.

Each of your friends is aligned with a particular arcana of the Tarot, and the protagonists personas each have a Tarot alignment as well. In addition to being able to wield multiple personas in battle, the main character can also fuse 2 or more personas together to create stronger personas which retain some of the skills of its constituent parts, and this is another area of the game which will suck your time away, because you can truly create some awesome things to help you out in battle this way. Making the best ones is both an art and a science.



In terms of gameplay mechanics, the fighting system boils down to you controlling the main character in battle while your other party members think and fight for themselves along your tactical guidelines (in the PS2 versions... the upcoming PSP version will allow you to control all your party members). However, there were some interesting elements which also bear discussion. For instance, in most other RPGs, if an enemy or a party member has a weakness, it usually means that an attack just hurts them more. In Persona 3, it goes beyond that... it will knock the entity receiving that attack down as well and whoever made the attack will get another turn. It is this seemingly small change to the combat dynamic that makes the whole affair take on a much more strategic feel. I was also pleased by the fact that unlike a lot of other games in the genre, you can have access to almost every attack/spell your enemies can throw at you and it works the same way... it isn't a watered down version. And the fact that status attacks, buffs/debuffs and instant death spells work throughout the game is also a refreshing change from systems that other games have that make them all but useless.



But at the heart of the game is a great, well-developed story, characters you care about and a sense of purpose unifying the whole experience. Gladly, it doesn't suffer from any of the narrative problems I found when discussing another Japanese role-playing game. I also have no complaints about production values, as it is clear that Atlus spent money on this game and it shows. The localization is well-done as well, though I have heard complaints about particular characters, but I didn't have a problem with the way they came across, so I think they are being a little nit picky.

Something which I appreciated was the fact that Atlus seems to have moved in a different direction than Square Enix when it comes to androgynous male characters. If you've played a Final Fantasy game, you know exactly what I mean. The characters also look like they are Asian, which is something that I notice is missing from other games in the genre as well.

It is a very very long game as well. The main storyline took me over 110 hours to complete and with the additional chapter provided in the FES edition clocking in at over 30 hours at least, you certainly get good value for your money. However, be warned that it is also a relatively hard game and some grinding may be required, and if you know me, you know I hate grinding. And yet, it is still such a compelling game that I still recommend it highly. In fact, if I was to redo my list of the Top 25 Playstation 2 games, it would land solidly in my top 10.

And with a new version coming out for the PSP, this game will be more widely available than ever. Hopefully the success that Atlus has had as of late with Demons Souls with translate into a wider release for this version of the game, as more people should have the opportunity to play it. (Atlus is notorious for having relatively small print runs for their games... it was so bad that to get a copy of P3FES, I had to order a copy from the States and have it delivered to a fellow blogger's house before having it shipped to myself).

But aside from those minor quibbles, it was an excellent experience all around.

Tags: persona 3, fes, silent protagonist, role playing game, j-rpg, atlus, shin megami, tensei, dark hour, hitler, nuclear war, nihilism, shadows, persona, playstation 2, psp, sony, dating sim, yahweh, apathy syndrome, tarot, narrative story telling, atelier iris, eternal mana, square enix, androgyny, final fantasy

Just What the World Needed: The Star Wars Sitcom

I don't know who was asking for it, but apparently, someone was, because George Lucas has given the green light to a Star Wars-related sitcom.

Seth Green, the co-creator of Robot Chicken, is reportedly already attached to the project.

I am wondering when the first lawsuit is going to pop up from someone who wrote fanfiction similar to a finished episode or series of episodes. You know it is happening.

Is this a late April Fools' joke or a serious endeavor? Only time will tell.

However, if George Lucas has his attention on such a project, perhaps he won't be in a position to wreck a future Indiana Jones movie. That would be a plus.

Tags: star wars, george lucas, indiana jones, seth green, sitcom, fan service, fan fiction

Sunday Video: The Big Lebowski: Porn Parody (SFW)

Yeeaaah. Wow... all I am going to say about.

Tags: big lebowski, porn parody

Week 47: Pageant of the Transmundane

An Ohio prisoner made one fatal mistake when he sent a letter to his mother with detailed instructions on how to smuggle drugs to him. However, this plan was foiled when he put a bad zip code on the letter, and it was opened along with other incoming mail to the prison. I am sure that wasn't a Good Friday all around.

Anyway, this week's winner is from the blog Caveman Circus.

The oddity it is 10 funny wrestling related Gifs. I don't know if I am sad to say that I can identify most of the individuals involved.

And because this week's winning entry has to do with wrestling, I thought the cover from the awful Simpsons Wrestling would be the most appropriate image for this



Congrats to the crew at Caveman Circus.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

This is not a meme. This is an award that I give out, and thus, I am not "tagging" you.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: caveman circus, wrestling, simpsons wrestling, drug smuggling, homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane

Friday Script Frenzy Feedings: What I am watching

I thought it would be interesting to list the movies I am watching specifically for the genre influences week after week for this Script Frenzy thing.

This first list includes the movies I watched prior to the Frenzy to whet my palette as it were.

Perhaps as this goes along, you will deduce what the horror comedy script I am working on is roughly about.

So far I have watched the following:

The Ruins
Cabin Fever
Dog Soldiers

And this week I am watching:

Jaws
The Faculty
Severance
Dead Snow

Tags: script frenzy, jaws, the ruins, cabin fever, dog soldiers, the faculty, severance, dead snow

Script Frenzy

I was going to write a post claiming that Uwe Boll was planning to remake the Super Mario Brothers movie, but that would have been mean and totally wrecked my credibility as a pop culture blogger(and I have so little to use up anyway, so it is better that I don't indulge in April Fools' jokes).

Anyway, for the past 16 months, I have been working on getting a television sitcom pilot written, I thought that I should get some practice writing in that format before I create something for a professional audience.

So I was pleased when I received an email announcing something that seemed right up my alley in terms of practice.

The same people behind National Novel Writing Month created a new site for Aprils for screenwriting called Script Frenzy.

I am going to try to write an horror comedy over the course of the month of April. I mean, I like grindhouse horror and I like black humor in my movies, so hey, it seems like a winner to me.

So, is anyone else going to join in? My username is historyis.

Tags: script frenzy, nanowrimo, national novel writing month, horror comedy, pilot, grindhouse, splatter