Week 25: Pageant of the Transmundane

I have to preface this week's celebration of the Transmundane with a note. I didn't intentionally look for something Halloween-related this week to laud, but nonetheless, it just sort of happened that way, which is a happy accident all things considered.

With that being said, this week's winning entry comes to us from the blog of Corey FOLO.

This time around, the winning entry incorporates a few elements which have proven to be factors that win Transmundanity Awards. It was a Japanese video where some young children are confronted by a zombie for a show, and there efforts to defeat it. We all know something like that would never fly on American television these days... people just don't like their kids to get scared anymore, which is a shame really. All this entry needed was Muppets in a movie mashup and it would have easily been the front runner for the Annual Transmundanity awards as well.

Since I've been using a lot of zombie Simpsons pictures as of late, I thought it might be a nice change of pace to focus on the other half of the equation... the Japanese part of the clip, and present this Japanese cover for The Simpsons Movie as the award image this week.



Congrats Corey... here is your badge.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogging village to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: corey folo, homer simpson, japanese game show, zombie, halloween, the simpsons movie, kids, pageant of the transmundane

The Halloween Related Story That Pissed Me Off

I was working on the computer last night when I overheard a local news story (not local to me, I think it was local to Seattle), which seems to be one of those interest stories that is spreading like wild fire.

Apparently this year is going to be the year of raunchy, overly sexualized costumes for preteens... and everyone needs to be afraid.

I can see why this is being covered, mainly because they usually show adults wearing versions of the same costumes so that people can be outraged and offended that kids might be wearing the same thing.

However, there was something that came up which really lit a fire under my ass to write this post... they brought up the idea that a pedophile was going to see a someone's kid in a provocative costume and suddenly just grab them.

In essence, what that particular news department is doing is taking a story which could be summed up in one short phrase: There is a shocking dearth of costumes appropriate for tweens (they are too old for kids costumes, and too young for teen/adult ones). That was enough... that is what the story is really about.

Throwing pedophiles in there is just sensationalism at its worst, something meant to make the story seem a lot more important than it really is. Because, I have yet to read any statistics regarding Halloween and pedophile activity, and I might even be willing to bet statistically it is probably safer than nearly every other day of the year (because you know the police are going to be looking for that and trick or treating is something which is highly scrutinized activity). I guess including it makes good copy though.

And the reason why that little addition made me angry was it was telling parents that going out for Halloween is inherently unsafe (just like those urban legends about razor blades in apples and such did for an earlier generation). So what that station, and likely other stations are doing is they are robbing a generation of kids of the joy of Halloween, and that is just irresponsible. Halloween is about scaring people, but this kind of reporting is not what anyone had in mind.

They should feel ashamed of themselves for giving overprotective parents more things to be worried about over a piece of clothing they are going to wear one day of the year.

Tags: halloween, local news, pedophiles, halloween, tweens, costumes, risque, adult-oriented, overprotective parents

Midweek Video: Henry Rollins' Liar

The reasons I posted this:

1. It is Halloween week and Henry Rollins does make a compelling devil.
2. I've been thinking about the fictive process all this week.
3. Someone was discussing honesty, drama and relationships on their blog.
4. Henry Rollins alone justifies it.

Tags: henry rollins, fiction, liar, relationships, manipulation, mind games

Express Checkout: 5 Things that I can't make a Pun with

- When I first read the story that comedian David Cross snorted cocaine in the presence of Barack Obama at the White House Correspondents' Dinner, that fact didn't shock me. What did shock me was the revelation that Cross is dating former Joan of Arcadia star, Amber Tamblyn (and that was the reason he got to go). And I don't know about you, but somehow, Larry the Cable Guy gained a lot of points in all this, because while he may play a redneck jackass for his fans, I think even he would have had the class not to snort coke in front of a sitting president.

- Over the weekend, my mother showed me a talking doll that she is going to give to my niece for Christmas, and part of the doll's programming is that she can read from a book of nursery rhymes... and when this was demonstrated to me, I was sort of appalled by something. It was almost a caricature of the Canadian accent... it was unbelievably broad. Granted, I haven't traveled across this great land, so maybe everybody but me and the rest of the people in my neck of the woods actually talks like that... but I've never heard that accent on television or on other media except when someone was mocking the accent (I swear, it is almost a McKenzie Brothers accent minus the ehs.). I know part of the issue with me has to do with how slowly the doll speaks so that a toddler can clearly understand the words, but it is still a surprisingly thick accent.

- I read over the weekend that Paul Haggis has left the Church of Scientology, and in doing so, it revealed just how in the dark the membership is about things that the organization is doing outside of the group. With filtering software on their computers and internal pressure not to question things, it seems that it takes a lot to push someone over the edge enough that individuals start looking for answers outside the group. I think Haggis's realization that he knows that the group is going to try to discredit him by using his own admissions during auditing against him was especially telling, and having that knowledge makes his public break from the Church that much braver. It is unfortunate that other members will likely not see things the way he has presented them however, rather, they will get a version which is twisted and missing its most critical parts. In short, he is going to be painted as some loony suppressive person who no one in the church should listen to, or that he is simply mistaken.

- Anyone taking bets on how long DMX, who isn't training BTW, is going to last in his first MMA bout? I am saying less than 60 seconds.

- I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that Spike Lee should be quiet for a while and just let his work as a director speak for him after he starting going after Tyler Perry. Look, I am not a fan of Perry's films, but I think when you are criticizing someone in your industry when you are in a position to, I don't know, make a movie which shows why what the other person is doing is deleterious, then that's what you should do. What I am really getting from this whole thing is that Spike Lee may be more upset that Tyler Perry's movies make more money than his own (and I think Oprah supporting Perry wholeheartedly probably irks him too).

Tags: dmx, mma, mixed martial arts, spike lee, madea, tyler perry, oprah winfrey, paul haggis, scientology, suppressive person, canadian accent, david cross, barack obama, correspondents dinner, joan of arcadia, amber tamblyn, cocaine, prop 8

Sunday Video: Money City Maniacs

I've been watching Life on Mars, the two halves of Grind House and old episodes of Barney Miller this weekend, and in the spirit of all that, I thought that it was only fitting to post a video that was from the 1970's.

And then looking at the first two items on the above list, I thought it would be better to post something that is definitely soaked in the vibe of the 1970's while retaining its feet chronologically in the modern age, and the first band that came to mind for me is Halifax's Sloan.

Though I now want to visit Future Shop for some strange reason.

Tags: sloan, halifax, 1970's, money city maniacs, future shop, riff, grind house, barney miller, life on mars

Week 24: Pageant of the Transmundane

A man was arrested in Virginia this week after a woman who was trespassing on his property spotted him naked in his own home. I will say that another way. A woman had a dude arrested after she did a little peeping on him. How does that work again? If the roles were reversed, would this still be going down this way?

Anyway, the winning entry this week comes to us from the fertile and artistic shores of Blow at Life.

The entry in question made me question my sanity a little bit, but in a good way. It is a giant bear robot attacking a city in marker and trust me, it is as cool as it sounds. I want to see this happen just to hear the news people try to come to terms with it.

And since this week's Pageant of the Transmundane winner is related to creatures controlling robots from the inside, an image of Homer sitting inside his own homemade fighting robot seemed to be the most appropriate image.



Congratulations Lawrence. Here is your web badge.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogosphere to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: blow at life, lawrence yang, pageant of the transmundane, homer simpson, i-d'ohbot, bear, robot suit, city destroyer, peeping tom, arrest

I wonder if this qualifies as a News Fail

From Yahoo! News a few days ago.



Wow. Robbie Williams really let himself go.

Tags: robbie williams, robin williams, yahoo, news, concert, news fail

A Little Bit Listy Today: Movie/Game List Comparisons

It seems like a lot of people in the blogging village are having some fun with the list that Rotten Tomatoes put together of the worst movies to be released in the 2000's, and I thought I would join in, though with my own special twist on the matter.

You see, marking movies off on one list might be fun, but making selections a more than one at once seemed like the way to go for me. So I went through 4, encompassing both movies and Playstation 2 gaming.

In a way, I am sort of embarrassed by the second movie list because there were so many I had to admit that I hadn't seen (I could have lied, but then where is the fun in that). At least I am giving people something to rag on me about.

But anyway on with the lists.

The Rotten Tomatoes List of the Worst Reviewed Movies of the past Decade. (Bold means I've seen it).

100 Whiteout (2009)
99 Glitter (2001)
98 Cheaper By the Dozen 2 (2005)
97 Boat Trip (2003)
96 All About Steve (2009)
95 Lost Souls (2000)
94 The New Guy (2002)
93 A Sound of Thunder (2005)
92 Babylon A.D. (2008)
91 Surviving Christmas (2004)
90 Dragonfly (2002)
89 Basic Instinct 2 (2006)
88 Kaena: The Prophecy (2004)
87 Testosterone (2003)
86 Pavilion of Women (2001)
85 Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector (2006)
84 Thr3e (2007)
83 Doogal (2006)
82 Supercross: The Movie (2005)
81 Extreme Ops (2002)
80 Big Momma’s House 2 (2006)
79 The Adventures of Pluto Nash (2002)
78 Deck the Halls (2006)
77 Date Movie (2006)
76 Johnson Family Vacation (2004)
75 Son of the Mask (2005)
74 Envy (2004)
73 Gigli (2003)
72 Broken Bridges (2006)
71 College (2008)
70 New Best Friend (2002)
69 The Cookout (2004)
68 Yu-Gi-Oh: The Movie (2004)
67 The Hottie & the Nottie (2008)
66 The Fog (2005)
65 Swept Away (2002)
64 Corky Romano (2001)
63 Yours, Mine, & Ours (2005)
62 Serving Sara (2002)
61 Good Luck Chuck (2007)
60 The Perfect Man (2005)
59 88 Minutes (2008)
58 Christmas with the Kranks (2004)
57 Godsend (2004)
56 Because I Said So (2007)
55 The Celestine Prophecy (2006)
54 Harry And Max (2005)
53 Modigliani (2005)
52 The Bridge of San Luis Rey (2005)
51 Fascination (2005)
50 Dirty Love (2005)
49 In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2008)
48 BloodRayne (2006)
47 Soul Survivors (2001)
46 Material Girls (2006)
45 My Baby’s Daddy (2004)
44 Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009)
43 Darkness (2003)
42 House of the Dead (2003)
41 Zoom (2006)
40 Down to You (2000)
39 Miss March (2009)
38 Happily N’Ever After (2007)
37 Code Name: The Cleaner (2007)
36 The Whole Ten Yards (2004)
35 Deal (2008)
34 The Haunting of Molly Hartley (2008)
33 Delta Farce (2007)
32 Deuces Wild (2002)
31 The Covenant (2006)
30 Fear Dot Com (2002)
29 Bless the Child (2000)
28 Rollerball (2002)
27 Battlefield Earth (2000)
26 Kickin’ It Old Skool (2007)
25 Meet the Spartans (2008)
24 Texas Rangers (2001)
23 The In Crowd (2000)
22 Disaster Movie (2008)
21 Epic Movie (2007)
20 Crossover (2006)
19 Half Past Dead (2002)
18 The Master of Disguise (2002)
17 Twisted (2004)
16 Daddy Day Camp (2007)
15 Alone in the Dark (2005)
14 Beyond a Reasonable Doubt (2009)
13 Constellation (2007)
12 Killing Me Softly (2002)
11 Merci Docteur Rey! (2002)
10 Witless Protection (2008)
9 Redline (2007)
8 3 Strikes (2000)
7 Strange Wilderness (2008)
6 Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 (2004)
5 National Lampoon’s Gold Diggers (2004)
4 King’s Ransom (2005)
3 Pinocchio (2002)
2 One Missed Call (2008)
1 Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (2002)


The Top 100 movies as scored by the user base at the IMDB. (Bold Means I've seen it).

1. The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
2. The Godfather (1972)
3. The Godfather: Part II (1974)
4. Il buono, il brutto, il cattivo. (1966)
5. Pulp Fiction (1994)
6. Schindler's List (1993)
7. 12 Angry Men (1957)
8. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
9. The Dark Knight (2008)
10. Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
11. Casablanca (1942)
12. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
13. Star Wars (1977)
14. Shichinin no samurai (1954)
15. Goodfellas (1990)
16. Rear Window (1954)
17. Cidade de Deus (2002)
18. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
19.Fight Club (1999)
20. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
21. C'era una volta il West (1968)
22. The Usual Suspects (1995)
23. Psycho (1960)
24. The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
25. Sunset Blvd. (1950)
26. The Matrix (1999)
27. Memento (2000)
28. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
29. Se7en (1995)
30. North by Northwest (1959)
31. It's a Wonderful Life (1946)
32. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
33. Citizen Kane (1941)
34. Léon (1994)
35. Apocalypse Now (1979)
36. American Beauty (1999)
37. American History X (1998)
38. Taxi Driver (1976)
39. Forrest Gump (1994)
40. Vertigo (1958)
41. Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
42. Up (2009)
43. WALL·E (2008)
44. Paths of Glory (1957)
45. Inglourious Basterds (2009)
46. Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain (2001)
47. Double Indemnity (1944)
48.Alien (1979)
49. M (1931)
50. Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
51. To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)
52. Saving Private Ryan (1998)
53. A Clockwork Orange (1971)
54. The Shining (1980)
55. The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948)
56. The Departed (2006)
57. The Third Man (1949)
58. The Pianist (2002)
59. Das Leben der Anderen (2006)
60. Chinatown (1974)
61. Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi (2001)
62. City Lights (1931)
63. Aliens (1986)
64. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
65. L.A. Confidential (1997)
66. Requiem for a Dream (2000)
67. Das Boot (1981)
68. Reservoir Dogs (1992)
69. The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)
70. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
71. El laberinto del fauno (2006)
72. Raging Bull (1980)
73. All About Eve (1950)
74. The Maltese Falcon (1941)
75. Singin' in the Rain (1952)
76. Slumdog Millionaire (2008)
77. Modern Times (1936)
78. Rashômon (1950)
79. Some Like It Hot (1959)
80. District 9 (2009)
81. The Prestige (2006)
82. Rebecca (1940)
83. Der Untergang (2004)
84. Gran Torino (2008)
85. Nuovo cinema Paradiso (1988)
86. The Apartment (1960)
87. Amadeus (1984)
88. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
89. The Elephant Man (1980)
90. La vita è bella (1997)
91. The Great Dictator (1940)
92. Metropolis (1927)
93. Once Upon a Time in America (1984)
94. Back to the Future (1985)
95. Full Metal Jacket (1987)
96. Ladri di biciclette (1948)
97. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939)
98. The Sting (1973)
99. The Great Escape (1963)
100. Braveheart (1995)

MetaCritic's 100 Top Rated PS2 Games (Bold for games I own, Bold/Italics for games which appeared on my list of the top 25 PS2 Games I have Played)

1 Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3
2 Grand Theft Auto III
3 Resident Evil 4
4 Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
5 Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
6 Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
7 Gran Turismo 3 A-Spec
8 Madden NFL 2003
9 Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 4
10 Devil May Cry
11 Madden NFL 2002
12 Madden NFL 2004
13 Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence
14 NCAA Football 2004
15 God of War
16 Virtua Fighter 4
17 Burnout 3: Takedown
18 Pro Evolution Soccer
19 God of War II
20 SSX
21 SSX 3
22 Okami
23 World Soccer Winning Eleven 6 International
24 NFL 2K3
25 Virtua Fighter 4: Evolution
26 Pro Evolution Soccer 2
27 World Soccer Winning Eleven 7 International
28 Soul Calibur II
29 SSX Tricky
30 NHL 2002
31 Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
32 Final Fantasy XII
33 Pro Evolution Soccer 3
34 Final Fantasy X
35 Guitar Hero II
36 Pro Evolution Soccer 5
37 ESPN NFL Football
38 Guitar Hero
39 Madden NFL 2001
40 Klonoa 2: Lunatea's Veil
41 Ratchet and Clank: Up Your Arsenal
42 Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater 2004 91
43 Twisted Metal: Black
44 Shadow of the Colossus
45 NCAA Football 2003
46 Dead or Alive 2: Hardcore
47 Madden NFL 2005 2004 91
48 World Soccer Winning Eleven 8 International
49 Pro Evolution Soccer 4
50 Ico
51 Tony Hawk's Underground
52 NBA Street Vol. 2
53 Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando
54 ESPN NFL 2K5
55 MVP Baseball 2004
56 Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy
57 Burnout Revenge
58 NCAA Football 2002
59 Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4
60 TimeSplitters 2
61 Viewtiful Joe
62 Rayman 2: Revolution
63 ESPN NHL Hockey
64 Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of the Cursed King
65 Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2004
66 NBA Street V3 2005 89
67 NHL 2K3
68 NBA 2K3
69 Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit 2
70 Ace Combat 4: Shattered Skies
71 Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell
72 Pro Evolution Soccer 6 2006 89
73 Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3 FES
74 World Soccer Winning Eleven 9
75 Gran Turismo 4
76 Silent Hill 2
77 NBA 2K2
78 ESPN NBA Basketball
79 NBA Street
80 Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2005
81 Madden NFL 06
82 Winning Eleven 8 (JPN Import)
83 Medal of Honor Frontline
84 Tekken 5
85 Ratchet & Clank
86 Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003
87 Red Faction
88 NCAA Football 2005
89 Sly 2: Band of Thieves
90 FIFA Soccer 2003
91 NASCAR Thunder 2004
92 Fight Night Round 2
93 SOCOM II: U.S. Navy SEALs
94 Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance
95 NCAA Football 06
96 Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell Chaos Theory
97 Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening Special Edition
98 Jak II
99 Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance
100 World Series Baseball 2K3

IGN's recent list of the 25 Best PS2 Games of All Time (Bold indicates I own the title, Bold/Italic indicates that the title appeared on my own list of the 25 Best PS2 Games I have Ever Played).

25. Grim Grimoire
24. We Love Katamari
23. Jak III
22. Disgaea: Hour of Darkness
21. Guitar Hero II
20. Silent Hill 2
19. Okami
18. Virtua Fighter 4: Evolution
17. Final Fantasy XII
16. Resident Evil 4
15. Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3 FES
14. Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of the Cursed King
13. ICO
12. Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal
11. Gran Turismo 4
10. Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening Special Edition
9. Kingdom Hearts
8. Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy
7. God of War
6. Burnout 3: Takedown
5. Final Fantasy X
4. Shadow of the Colossus
3. Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence
2. God of War II
1. Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Tags: top 100, top 25, ps2, playstation 2, movies, imdb, rotten tomatoes, metacritic, ign, comparison, meme

Cut Rate Cultural Analysis: The Waterboy

You know when you see a scene in a movie and you know that it is stupid, but it isn't until you've seen it multiple times that you realize just how dumb it is.

I had one of those moments when I just happened to catch the end of The Waterboy on the weekend. If you haven't seen it by now, and you plan on doing so, well, this may not be the entry for you.

You see, I used to think the final football scene in the movie was stupid because it involved Sandler, who plays an exceptional linebacker, somehow making a 40+ yard pass (since the Mud Dogs are in field goal range) to the quarterback who was streaking towards the end zone to win the game by 4 points.

I mean, I can buy someone who has been kicked around their whole life being able to sublimate all that stress and resentment into being an effective defensive threat, but I can't buy that same person being able to throw a ball with precision to someone who isn't trained to make a big catch on a play that the coach just drew up.

This bothered me for a while, but then I realized that the situation presented is even more stupid when you think about the context.

You see, The Waterboy is a movie about College Football and those of you who are familiar with that sport are also likely familiar with how overtime works. There are no ties in the modern game, even during Bowl games. In College Football, overtime is an almost egalitarian experiment, because both teams get to have possession of the ball and a chance to score.

The Mud Dogs had a more than competent kicker, and under the rules of NCAA football, they have a chance to take out the other team in a fair manner in overtime (after all, they have a linebacker who is a one man army... a defensive player so good that the opposing team wouldn't even run plays against him).

It wouldn't have been as dramatic, but man, if it was a real game, you know that's what would have happened. And this is coming from someone who, when playing Madden, almost always goes for it.

Tags: the waterboy, adam sandler, miracle rally, college football, louisiana, overtime, go for 3, madden, bowl game

Ugly Betty and the Friday Night Graveyard

The ratings are in and the season premiere of Ugly Betty has been called "soft". I would like to take this opportunity to say, "Well, Duh!". This move is going to lead to the end of the show, just as many bloggers have predicted.

How do I know this? Because even I couldn't be bothered to watch the premiere on Friday, and I've written glowing things about the show many times over the years. I ended up sticking a tape in the VCR (yes, some of us still use those because we aren't blessed with DVR's and such) and I will eventually watch it. I don't know when, but it will likely be before the next episode.

And the thing is, I am always around on Fridays anyway, but somehow I can't muster any enthusiasm to watch it in its current time slot.

But when I think about it, more than a few shows that I used to enjoy suddenly became a lot less appealing as soon as they were given a Friday Night slot.

I mean, I loved Prison Break when it was on Mondays, but as soon as it moved to Fridays to end its run, it was almost like a chore to watch.

Hell, I've even been having trouble watching Friday Night Smackdown consistently as of late, and that is the good wrestling show at the moment. I would probably have a problem watching premiere episodes of Mythbusters if they were being shown on a Friday even.

I think the only show that I consistently watched on Friday Nights without complaint is South Park (in Canada, the new episodes of South Park air on Friday).

I know I can't be alone in this... this malaise has to be one of the main reasons why ratings on Friday and Saturday nights are generally so weak (aside from the socializing/dating aspects of the night too I mean). Maybe I will get over this whole Friday thing, but I have my doubts... and in a way, I am sad to see Ugly Betty end its television life like this.

Tags: ugly betty, mythbusters, prison break, south park, friday night, smackdown, make over, ratings, meade, television, wrestling, competition, social life, vcr

Week 23: Pageant of the Transmundane

I know I said I wasn't going to be blogging this week, but the Pageant of the Transmundane has always been the exception to that. I mean, I sort of have to recognize the oddity that blogging brings to light... and I can't shrink from that responsibility.

This week's winning entry comes from the relatively new blog Awesome Robot!

What little nugget of strange and wondrous material did I find there? Well, conceptually, it all starts with Stalin Zombies, and it just gets weirder from there. When Gorbachev shows up, it is almost as if the whole thing reaches a transmundane critical mass.

And since this has to do with zombies, once again I went to the well and found yet another picture of Homer Simpson as a Zombie... this time in tattoo form.



Congrats go out to Sirio B, who also recently started a blog called Snack Overload! which seems quite interesting (even if I don't have access to most of the food that he discusses along with his partner).



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogosphere to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: snack overload, awesome robot, sirio b, homer simpson, zombie, pageant of the transmundane, tattoo, gorbachev, stalin, russia

Taking a Break

Yep, I'm taking another short break to freshen up.

You know the drill, I should be back by next Monday, but I am not making any promises.

Sunday Video: Jurassic Bond

James Bond + Dinosaurs = Pure Win

Tags: pierce brosnan, goldeneye, jurassic park, james bond, judi dench

Week 22: Pageant of the Transmundane

A woman in the Houston area came home to discover that a pitbull had broken into her house and was playing with her dogs. The suspect pooch was quickly apprehended, however, not before doing a lot of damage to her house and soiling her floor. It is unknown if the dog was named Marley or Snots, but inquiries are surely being made.

This week's winning entry comes for the rather professional outlet TV Munchies at Comedy.com. I try to avoid blogs that are a little too professional, but in this case, I had to make one of those rare exceptions.

I encountered a post called 15 Ladies who would look better with a mustache, and it had me rolling, especially since some of the explanations do make a lot of sense. I am not going to tell you which one to me seemed spot on, but trust me when I say, the explanation makes the case indeed.

And since this week's winning entry is about mustaches, well, it seems highly appropriate to have a picture of Homer sporting facial hair beyond his five o'clock shadow.



Congrats to the crew at TV Munchies for this hilarious collection of mustached ladies.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogosphere to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, tv munchies, marley, pit bull, marley, snots, 15 ladies, mustache, harry potter, comedy.com

Friday Favorite: The World's Shittiest Mixtape.... NOT!

I almost posted this last week for the Friday Favorite, but knowing that I was going to ask people about the most depressing songs they've heard, reposting today seemed like a more ideal solution.


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College Humor once again gave me something to ponder. Two guys made a bet about who could make, and I quote "the world's shittiest mixtape", with the loser having to carry a boombox blasting out the entire contents of the contest.

And while I do admire the fact that the loser did go out of the street with a big boombox for the afternoon after losing, I think that both contestants could have done so much more with the challenge.

I mean, in actuality, I would call what they ended up making at best, a lame mixtape, because really, the barrel has so much more crap at the bottom of it and neither party got even close to scraping said bottom.

Paula Cole? Sixpence None the richer? Gloria Estefan? Really... this is the best they could come up with? The whole point of the exercise was not only did the songs have to be bad, but they had to be really embarrassing to be associated with.

Get some polka on that thing... some Tiny Tim, or some really weird found music. There was a lot of ways they could have made a horrifyingly shitty mixtape, and I just think they copped out.

When I started watching the video, I thought something like YMCA by the Village People would pop up or anything disco really. Or what about this. It looked like late summer/early autumn... why not Jingle Bells as performed by dogs. And the world of covers alone could have won that contest. The possibilities seem endless, but the execution was weak.

So, what would you have put on the world's shittiest mixtape?

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And in thinking about this post, I can think of so many more warped things that could have been on that tape. I mean, if you went to a dollar store and bought discount cds there, you could probably fill many such tapes with ease.

Tags: college humor, mixtape, paula cole, gloria estefan, sixpence none the richer, ymca, singing dog, tiny tim, LFO, polka, boombox

Posts I've Been Trying to Write

I was just looking over the drafts I have sitting waiting for some more polish or even enough attention to get a passable first draft of something, and some interesting articles seemed to have appeared, and I thought I would talk about some of them so that if they ever did end up being completed, you could be as amazed as I am that they got published.

-I've been meaning to call out all the people in the political sphere who have been so casually throwing out terms like Nazi and calling their opponents Hitler or other prominent Nazi officials for not having any real perspective... and you know I would have been all kindness and consideration on that one, wouldn't you?

-My weird fascination with real life disaster and its recreation on both television and in the movies.

-Remembering Streets of Fire (though truth be told, now that Yum Yum got this one, I might not do this one at all or I'll delay it for many more months).

-What I mean when I call someone a douchebag and an asshole respectively.

-A post on how much I enjoy intertextuality.

-How I would have made Good Luck Chuck a good movie.

And the grand daddy of them all, the legendary Open Letter to Roger Ebert which was meant to counter his anti-video game arguments. I started this thing back in July of 2007, and every time I go back to it, I think of more things to say. I do believe its time has passed, but wow, if I would have gotten it done in a timely manner, it would have been an epic post (or series of posts).

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As a sidenote, I sort of wanted to put together a post of the most depressing songs ever written, and I'd love to have your input. If you have a suggestion, leave me a comment telling me about the song or email me at campybeaver@gmail.com.

Tags: hitler, nazi, politics, invective, disaster, streets of fire, yum yum, intertextuality, good luck chuck, open letter, roger ebert, depressing songs

Midweek Video: Gremlins: The New Batch VOD/DVD sequence

A dude named Sacha Feiner put together an awesome new sequence for Gremlins 2: The New Batch to replace the two medium specific cuts this movie had (for the film release, there is a sequence which involves the Gremlins destroying the film and the theatre manager going to Hulk Hogan in the audience yelling at them so they fix the film and there is a VHS-specific edit as well).

Sacha decided that the age of the DVD and Video On Demand service needed its own sequence, so on a shoestring budget, he decided to see what he could come up with. I have to say, he did some first rate work.

And I respect the fact that Sacha used puppets for his edits... which is indeed in keeping with the original film.

I've read that Joe Dante has seen this and is very taken with it (I've read further rumor that he actually wants to include it in future DVD cuts of the movie).

I guess it just goes to show you that you don't need a big budget to do great effects work (the figure of 3 grand has been bandied about for this whole thing).

Tags: gremlins, new batch, hulk hogan, sacha feiner, joe dante, exorcism, video on demand, dvd, mogwai, raiders of the lost ark, batman, spielberg

The Dream Files: Planet Terror Reimagined

Generally, hearing about other people's dreams is about as interesting as hearing about what someone pulled out of their navel... but I think this is one of those rare occasions where it is worth mentioning (like if I had pulled a diamond ring out of my navel).

You see, I had a dream over the weekend where the characters from the movie Planet Terror were replaced by fast food commercial characters. Naturally, if you haven't seen the movie, there may be a few spoilers in this.

This gets really weird really fast. Won't you join me in the laughs.

I have to mention one of the strangest substitutions first, because it sets up everything else.

Rose McGowan's Cherry Darling was Grimace. Now picture that freak of nature trying to do the pole dancing with its short legs and stubby arms. I can't stop laughing because that image is just so strangely funny. And the idea of Grimace running around with a gun for a leg is just bizarre.

Marley Shelton's Dr. Dakota Block was played by Birdie, which isn't that weird considering. There isn't that many female characters in the fast food world, so this makes sense (though some would argue that my subconscious should have made Cherry Birdie, but that is just splitting hairs really).

Dr. William Block (Josh Brolin) was The Burger King, which is best dream casting ever, because he is the creepiest character in that movie. Of course, if the dream was utilizing the framework of No Country for Old Men, you know that the Burger King would have been Anton Chigurh.

Freddy Rodriguez's Wray was The Hamburglar, and when he did that sweet running flip off the wall, the hat stayed on, making the maneuver that much more awesome. Now, imagine Hamburglar riding the minibike. Of course, when you think about the fact that later in the movie, Hamburglar and Grimace get it on, you can understand why that reel of reel the movie went missing.

Deputy Tolo and Sheriff Hague (Tom Savini and Michael Biehn respectively) were played by Officer Big Mac and Mayor McCheese. I would have thought that J.T. would have been one of those two characters because the Sheriff is his brother and those two McDonald's characters share more than a passing similarity to each other.

And J.T. (Jeff Fahey) was Jack in the Box, Bruce Willis was The Big Boy and Naveen Andrews was Colonel Sanders.

Also notable is the fact that Naveen Andrews' line "I also want the balls" was transmogrified as "I also want the McNuggets." I don't know if he was referring to testicles as McNuggets or if he really wanted McNuggets (I could see a character based on the Colonel having a bag full of the testicles of his fast food enemies.

But what I find hilarious is that despite the fact that McDonald's characters dominated it, there was no Ronald McDonald. I don't know... maybe if the dream would have continued, he would have been Machete or someone from another trailer in the Grind House feature.

I don't have nightmares... but I think this once again proves that I have weird dreams.

Tags: grind house, planet terror, mcdonald's, ronald mcdonald, grimace, cherry darling, marley shelton, dakota block, naveen andrews, jeff fahey, bruce willis, big boy, burger king, josh brolin, robert rodriguez, rose mcgowan, hamburglar

Touch: The Skittles Ad I can't Stop Thinking About

I know Skittles commercials are supposed to be surreal and weird, but there is just something about one of the ads in particular, Touch, that bothers me and makes me ask a lot of questions about that particular version of the world.

Maybe it is the fact that someone thought it was a good idea to have someone whose touch turns objects into Skittles working at a desk with a computer and a phone. I mean, really, what does he do at his place of work exactly? Is he the implied threat of doom if you don't perform? I mean, it seems sort of mean to have someone sit at a desk with things they can't use, in a way that is almost mocking him day in and day out. That's just sadistic. I mean, given his limitations as a worker, I guess the only people he could possibly work for would be Mars, the maker of Skittles. It is a talent which could be very useful for them, as he can turn anything into the candy, so I could see them using this particular talent/curse to turn even garbage into Skittles, making that division the greenest industrial activity in the world.

That'd probably have to label them as such of course, and then some plucky policemen would discover that in addition to vast piles of trash, the occasional dead body would be thrown into the mix, and he start running through the streets yelling "Skittles Green is made from people!" and that wouldn't be good for anyone. Maybe he could feed starving children in the third world with his skill though (that or because of the sugar content of the candy, arable land which is used to grow sugar cane could be put to other use).

When they show this commercial on TV, they usually cut out the part where he talks about killing someone by shaking their hand... because that is really brutal for a commercial. And you just know some little kid on that bus ate some of the Skittles, which is doubly upsetting because a) they used to be part of a human being and b) I've seen the floor of a bus, and you don't want to eat anything off of one. Which begs the question: does he pay for the bus with Skittles?

I also wonder how this individual managed the act of lovemaking without touching his lover with his hands... did she milk his prostate? Or did he develop the Skittles curse after she was impregnated (and I think having hands that turned things into Skittles would all but bar you from adoption).

I wonder how many Skittles this dude eats in a day, because if you are making something which is marginally considered food from your fingertips, you probably eat a few of them... though I can imagine that he would utterly despise them now as they represent everything that is evil in the world to him. Does he go to a support group.

Correct me if I am wrong, but isn't that girl Flo from those Progressive Commercials?

Clearly it is a commercial that asks more questions than it answers.

Tags: skittles, mars incorporated, touch, wrigley, bus, progressive, stephanie courtney, adoption, murder, soylent green, charlton heston, green, king midas, office work

Sunday Video: Adam Sessler on Reviewing Continuity

Back in early 2007, I wrote an article about game reviewing standards (especially in terms of the raw numbers critics assign to titles), and I had almost forgotten about it, but then I saw this video, part of the Sessler's Soapbox series of vlog posts from G4 Tech TV, and it brought the whole matter back for me.

I just hope that more reviewers and critics start approaching new titles with this kind of appraisal... that individual games are part of a continuum of subtle innovations and at times out and out homages to earlier work in the medium. I want to see a higher level of criticism in game reviewing.

Tags: adam sessler, video game reviews, x-play, sessler's soapbox

Week 21: Pageant of the Transmundane

It is rumored that Microsoft is poaching staff from various Apple retail outlets to work for them as they start their own retail outlets. Being associated with Apple, naturally they are much more expensive than people that were hired independently. No word on if Justin Long is going to be hired for Microsoft commercials.

This week's winning entry comes from the perennial contender Popped Culture, which always has something transmundane to say about pop culture.

In this case, it was a vision of where the Terminator franchise should have went: Back to the Future... err the past.

Of course, this image isn't relevant merely because it is Homer in the act of traveling through time. You see, his companions in this picture are Sherman and Peabody, and when Marty McFly lands in 1955, he is at Peabody farm, and the kid on that farm is named Sherman Peabody.



Congrats Jeremy. You know the drill. Here is your badge.



The rules of this little contest: Every week I will be selecting one blog post that I have seen from the vast reaches of the blogosphere to bestow with the Homer Simpson Transmundanity Award for being one of the freakiest(in a funny way) things I've seen or read during a 7 day period. It doesn't necessarily have to have been written during the week, I just had to have encountered it. That means that if you find something interesting and repost it like a movie or whatever, if I saw it at your blog first, you get the prize. Of course, creating your own content is also a very good way to win.

Now, if you see a post that you think is worthy of this illustrious prize, just drop me a line at campybeaver@gmail.com and we'll see if we can't get your suggestion up and award-ready while giving you some credit and a link to your own blog.

Tags: homer simpson, pageant of the transmundane, terminator, back to the future, popped culture, jeremy barker, t-1000, sherman, peabody, time and punishment

The Hitchhiking Movie: A Review

A few weeks back, I was given the opportunity to get a screener of the documentary The Hitchhiking Movie, and naturally, I jumped at the chance, both because I am a great fan of documentary film and because it was the first movie screener I've ever been offered.

The premise is that Ryan Jeanes and filmmaker Phillip Hullquist challenged themselves by trying to hitchhike from New York to Los Angeles over the first week of July 2007 (the added pressure was that they had to arrive in Los Angeles by a certain time as there was a plane ticket waiting to take them home). The other condition was they couldn't really spend money, so they had to truly depend on the kindness of strangers. The question is: can they make it? Watch the trailer to get a little bit of the flavor of this project.

Now the expectation that is likely in place is that I will discuss some of the kooky characters they meet along the way, but in reality, most of the people they meet along the way are ordinary people, and in a way, that makes the whole experience a little more interesting because those people are much easier to relate to. There were characters to be sure, but most of the people who ended up picking them up were people like you and me, dealing with their own problems, and in the end, I think it ended up being a much better cross section of the kinds of people who pick up hitch hikers. We meet almost all of the people who helped them make this journey, but there are a few who really stood out and they became the focus of the project, especially those who took the pair quite a few miles down the road.

What really surprised me, and maybe the fact that a documentary was being filmed influenced this, but there were people who picked them up who eventually let them do some of the driving. Perhaps this is more common than I, someone who has never hitchhiked, would expect. Either that, or there is still some trust on America's highways and byways. (The fact that this trip happened in the general vicinity of the Fourth of July probably didn't hurt either.)

The Hitchhiking Movie is the essence of independent documentary film making. Watching the credits, I noted that aside from Ryan and Philip, only two other people were involved in editing the film or adding additional flair, so it is indeed a very personal vision of the two people involved in the journey. This movie shows an entertaining slice of America, and it is fun watching the adventure, and the two filmmakers take their hardships with humor and grace, even when they have brushes with the law.

I have to note that there was one thing that took me out of the experience at times, and it is a small thing I admit, but it is still something I have to note. You see, there are more than a few occasions where there are spelling errors in the transcription of what is being said. Again, I said it wasn't a major thing, but it was something that happened enough that it was noticeable. But I am a stickler for things like that sometimes (though I know I have made enough errors like that over the years, so I still live in a little bit of a glass house).

The two men behind this film are currently working on a project that involves their trip down the entirety of the Mississippi River from its source all the way down to the Gulf of Mexico, which seems like it should be some interesting viewing as well, and I look forward to seeing it when it is completed.

The Hitchhiking Movie opens at the Secret City Film Festival in Oak Ridge, Tennessee on October 9th and it is available for purchase from their website.

Tags: the hitchhiking movie, review, screener, mississippi, 11 visions, phillip hullquist, ryan jeanes, 2007, secret city film festival, oak ridge, tennessee, independent documentary